Birthday week

Updates – What’s New in my World? And, Oye, Another Birthday?

Published on by dgkaye

So, I often write about some of the goings on in my life and in my head/heart. Last Thursday was probably the best day I’ve had since I was in Mexico with my new wonderful friends.

Today, (the post goes live) is my ‘something’th’ birthday, and I probably won’t be answering your comments till much later tonight, because it will be my new best day because I’ll be spending it with my bestie, Banan, known as Bri in my books.

But getting back to Thursday – weeks previous to Thursday, I’d come up with the decision that I have to start expanding my horizons and decide what kind of group activity I’d like to join. The time is long overdue.

I’d thought about joining a grief group where I could be among ‘my people’, or joining a gym, women’s fitness – no men as I’m not interested in getting hit on. I couldn’t find anywhere close that had an actual, non online grief group. I’m at the point where I need to be around way more people, to find new friends that don’t live far away and whom I have things in common with – not necessarily grief – but a human or two I can connect with, someone who I can look into their eyes when speaking as opposed to chatting on a computer screen.

I talk to my friends online often in chat boxes, but there’s nothing better than real talk with humans face to face. I’m a people person and feel myself shrinking by spending too much time left to my own devices. I promised my two besties I was seriously going to join something when I decided where I’d feel most comfortable, and I decided to email a contact form for a Goodlife Fitness Women’s Gym, only ten minutes away, and went for the tour last Thursday.

Asal showed me around with a guided tour for over an hour. She was a sweet young girl. It felt great just to get out and talk to Asal (whose name that took me three tries to pronounce, and we laughed together). She asked me a short questionnaire – my goals, what I was wanting out of joining, any classes I’d be interested in. I told her my husband died a year ago and I’m taking my first steps in trying to rejoin civilization, mainly joining to take part in some classes for social interaction – Zumba and Yoga.

I’ve pushed myself to commitment and went back yesterday, to use the free pass to try out whatever equipment I wanted in the gym for however long I wanted, and they had great special plans to choose from at reasonable prices, and Asal was dropping the ‘joinup’ fee of $100, if I signed up then. I figured I’d try the two classes a week and use the treadmill and some of the weights, before I dived into machines. So I told Asal I’d like to use my free pass day Monday, (yesterday), and that I’d come while she’s on shift so I could sign up with her. So now I’m a member. For approximately $20 a week I can go whenever I want and to however many classes I want. I liked midday because there were people but not so many. I figured I’d eventually strike up a friendship with someone, it’s close to home, it’s only women, so what do I have to lose. And who knows, in the process, I could get in good shape. Sounds like a win/win. So this is my progress.

So, getting back to Thursday, before I got to the gym. I was on my way to the gym waiting for the elevator on my floor, where this attractive older woman was standing. I’d never seen her before, but then again, I’m picky who I want in my close circles in the building where I live, lol. I have a few friends from upstairs on my old condo floor, neighborly friends, but not real close. And there were many lovely greetings from what seemed the, ‘widow’s floor’ I’d moved on to, but nobody I felt a connection with. But today, there was ‘Marsha’.

My condo is, unfortunately, close to the elevator. I came out, locked my door, turned around and walked ten steps to the elevator. I saw the back of her and her pretty blonde bob before she turned around and asked, ‘Does it bother you living close to the elevators?’ I replied, not really. There’s no noise. I just feel like my door is vulnerable for quick break-in getaways if there were any, and have to remember not to talk on the phone near the door for fearing of being overheard.

We laughed while waiting for the usual long elevator wait. She told me she just moved in last month and gave me a short synopsis of her being twice a widow. She’s very attractive, and we shared a similar humor. I took her for her early 70s. I gave her my short synopsis, and after we got off on the lower level together, while I was going to the parking lot and she, to vote in our library, we both finally took a breath and were about to go our parting ways, when she told me her apartment number and added, ‘knock on my door around 645, I’ll show you my place then we’ll go sit outside in our park.

After I got back from the gym, my new good friend from Mexico, Shelley, Whatsapp video called, and we had a two hour catch-up and planning when I’m going to visit her and stay at her place for a few days. She lives in Brighton, Ontario, about a two-hour highway drive east of me. Me, anxiety highway driving woman. But, I made up my mind. I am driving to Shel’s. I’m not taking the train. That, my friends, will be an adventure.

We laughed about all our antics this past winter, and the things we’re going to do together next winter in Puerto Vallarta- definitely heading up to the best market in Bucerias. And we’re looking at late June for my first summer visit, as soon as it warms up to swimming weather again, as typically, our hot summer is now feeling like the cool of spring, and it looks that way on the weathermap for the next few.

My Bestie, Banan called while I was talking to Shel. I declined her call, texted her that I was on the phone with Shelley. I did call her back much later, almost dinnertime, of course no answer. I left her a text to listen to my long message about my surprising day. I told her to call me tomorrow because I had to make some dinner and I was rushing to meet Marsha. Banan was thrilled.

We caught up the next day. And I will end this here, and then I will reveal more about my outdoor meeting with Marsha and our walk to the coffee shop on Sunday, in next week’s episode.

I’m being bold and stepping back into civilization – baby steps, but it’s happening!

TBC….

©DGKaye2022

71 thoughts on “Updates – What’s New in my World? And, Oye, Another Birthday?”

  1. This is wonderful, the most uplifting post you’ve written for some time. Always good to make a new friend and going to the gym, that’s awesome! Looking forward to more. Happy Happy Birthday!! Sending love and hugs. xo

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  3. Happy birthday, lovely Debby – I hope you have a wonderful day. It was great to hear about your life and all your different activities. I think we all need some friendships, interests and activities away from the computer. It’s fantastic you’ll be driving to Brighton – it takes real courage to get out of your comfort zone like that. Toni x

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  5. Happy Birthday, Debby! I’m happy you’ve met such interesting people and life is looking up. I look forward to hearing more about your adventures. And I’m with you about meeting people face to face, now that we finally can.

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  7. It takes such courage to take these steps and here you are, taking them. UB, kudos to you with oodles of love. ❤ The gym, conversations and experimenting with what works for you….go, Debbie..more ❤ ❤ ❤

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  9. Happy Birthday, Debby! And congratulations on baby steps. For me, those steps included music events and that’s where I began to rejoin the land of the living. For each person, it’s different, but I also believe in a little bit of synchronicity and fate (like the woman being at the elevator at the exact time). Sending you hugs and good wishes!

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    1. Thanks so much Jan for the wishes. And absolutely, it’s always been that way. Anyone of importance of my life I met with synchronicity and fate. Goes back to my saying” We meet people for reasons and seasons. ❤

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  10. Happy birthday, Debby 🙂 It sounds like people are coming into your life right at the perfect time. I like the idea of a woman’s gym too.

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  11. Happy birthday, Debby! You’ve turned a corner and the sun is shining. Wonderful! Sending hugs and love!! 🎈🤗🎈

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  12. Debby, I so understand you not wanting to join any online classes. I’ve done enough of them during the pandemic and I really want real live contact which I get with a fitness class and playing golf with some friends.
    Great that you joined the gym and hope that you find the activities there that you like. I’ve been doing yoga for about 20 years ad it’s a great stretching exercise as well as a meditative one. I also like pilates.
    I haven’t been online very much lately and frankly being present for my sister is my priority right now and I don’t want to become overwhelmed.
    Happy Birthday! Wishing you a year filled with peace and harmony.
    xxx
    Carol

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    1. Thank you for stopping by my friend, and for your lovely wishes. I did yoga classes years ago and did pilates at home for many years. They aren’t offering Pilates right now but they are opening up more classes as Covid life fades and people start coming out. I know I’ll enjoy yoga again, and hopefully make a few new friends along the way. Your sister is very lucky to have. you. ❤

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  14. You are a sherpa, Deb. This post is an inspiration, a guide for those who fear adventure. So glad you’re spending your b-day with Banan. Feel the gazillion hugs I’m sending you right now ❤️💜💛💚💙

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  15. It does sound like you are ready to embrace life once again. Kudos for taking those first steps! Have a wonderful birthday celebration with your friend. Cheers! 🍾🥂

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  16. Getting together with old and new friends seems like the right thing because you’re listening to yourself, and you’re ready. There is no substitute for human contact. Much of my trip was for that exact reason.

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    1. So true Pete. I think most of the world could drop their phones after this Covid life and so many sad stories and re-engage in real life. 🙂

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  17. Hi Debby – I’m glad you’re getting out and about … makes sense … and sounds the ‘openness’ is helping in general … take your time, but good to read this. Enjoy the getting out and about, especially now as summer is here … all the best – cheers Hilary

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  19. Good for you, Debby, for realizing that this is something within your control and then doing something about it. And isn’t it weird that, as soon as you feel ready and resolved, the doors start flying open! The universe is very willing to support us in that way. And Happy Something-th Birthday! I hope it was a wonderful day. Big hugs.

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    1. Thanks so much Diana. You are so right. The universe always brings us doors when we are ready to allow them. I had a lovely day and evening with my BFF and that was just perfect. ❤

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  22. Happy belated birthday, Deb! I’m so happy reading your post, just knowing you are feeling open to meeting new friends and getting out there. Marsha sounds like a fun and outgoing lady! It’s nice to have connections with people close by. And sounds like your gym membership will prove to be a wonderful addition to your lifestyle. I find the local library is a nice way to see people in your own neighborhood as well. Of course talking loud is discouraged, but whispering is not 😉 A simple smile at someone in the same book section can lead to a friendship…who knows? For those of us lurking in the library, we already have something in common, the love of books! Looking forward to hearing more about your Thursday. xx Hugs!

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  24. Happy birthday! This was such a wonderful post and I read it with a huge smile. I’m very happy for you and the steps you’re taking to get back out there. Hugs, Debby!

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  27. Wow, this is all wonderful news, Debby! The stars are aligning for you to be social and to meet – and visit – amazing friends and soulmates! Yay. Baby steps. Good for you for joining a gym as well. Soon, you will need to catch your breath from all that chatting. 🙂

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  29. Hooray! I can’t wait to hear about meeting Marsha. When it rains people, it pours. Enjoy all the new people and activities. I’m so happy for you, Debby. Sounds like the best birthday ever.

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  30. I wish you well in this new journey, Debby. It sounds like it’s set to continue, and it’s so good to hear about that. Well done for signing up to the gym. That’s a place I can’t remember when I last visited, so I’ve no idea how it’s changed.
    Happy belated birthday.

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    1. Thank you so much Hugh for the wishes. Lol, be warned – if you’re out of shape like I am, the gym is brutal, lol. Stay tuned for my next week’s post. ❤

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  31. Pingback: Updates – Week One at the Gym…and Marsha – DGKayewriter.com

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