Guest Author Feature – Balroop Singh – Allow Yourself To Be A Better Person

Featured author of the week


Today’s guest feature is author/blogger and friend, Balroop Singh. She is a nonfiction writer and a poet.


I met Balroop through blogging when I found so many of her posts resonated with my own personal beliefs. Balroop is a beautiful spirit, and an eternal optimist despite weathering many storms in her past, and all of her books are based on her spiritual and inspirational writing.

I recently had the pleasure of reading her latest book – Allow Yourself To Be a Better Person, (my review is here), and I knew, based on what she shares of herself and her experience that I would love that book and I look forward to eventually reading all of her books.

Author Balroop Singh


About Balroop:

Balroop Singh, a former teacher, an educationalist, a blogger, a poet and an author always had a passion for writing. The world of her imagination has a queer connection with realism. She could envision the images of her own poetry while teaching the poems. Her dreams saw the light of the day when she published her first book: ‘Sublime Shadows Of Life.’ She has always lived through her heart. She is a great nature lover; she loves to watch birds flying home. The sunsets allure her with their varied hues that they lend to the sky. She can spend endless hours listening to the rustling leaves and the sound of waterfalls. Balroop lives in Danville, California.


Allow Yourself To Be A Better Person by Balroop Singh


Balroop’s latest book, Allow Yourself To Be a Better Person is Available at Amazon 



Do you think you are a good person? Would you like to meet your better self? Welcome to the vast vistas that this book unravels before you by highlighting the shaded areas that could never get your attention.
Enhancement of personality is a long process, which starts only when we acknowledge the need for it. Often we detest looking at our imperfections and if somebody is professionally successful, the thought doesn’t even strike.
This book enlightens you about the goodness, which lies dormant within us till we make an effort to explore it. It exhorts you to introspect and accept natural human failings. It guides you towards the metamorphosis that could make you an endearing personality.


Welcome Balroop and I’m happy to have you here today to enlighten us about yourself and your inspirational writing.


From conversations we’ve shared in comments and many of your posts and your poetry, I detect that your childhood wasn’t ideal. How did you learn to rise above and not fall prey to the negativity you encountered?


Whenever I hear this song – “Give me some sunshine, give me some rain, give me another chance, I wanna grow up again”…tears well up in my eyes and my heart can feel the pang concealed in this verse. I know there are children who don’t have a perfect childhood even today and when I look at them or read their stories, I tell myself…I was okay.

It is quite difficult to share layers of darkness that shroud me but I lost my father to a road accident when I was 12 and you can understand how challenging life could be for us. I grew up in the cauldron of circumstances, adversities molded my personality and my mother’s determination steeled me. I learned all the lessons of life by encountering them head on and negativity was a very little element in the face of setbacks that I saw at a very young age. When you tell yourself what could be worse than what we have, negativity dare not touch you!


Your writing is not only beautiful but filled with such wisdom about human emotions. What kind of experiences did you encounter in life when you were younger that inspired you to write books?


Who cares about human emotions? Do people understand them? Is it essential to display them when they can be read through one’s eyes? Many such questions haunted me when I was told to grieve. ‘How dare you smile or laugh’…was the perpetual message! Societal norms, judgmental people and a feeling of emptiness encompassed me during the most impressionable years of growing up.

I did put up a brave front, telling myself that it must be the way of the world. Moments of joy around me were snatched away by those who chose to live in sorrow but I learnt very early that emotions could never be suppressed; it is better to accept them, embrace them and conduct a meaningful dialogue with them. Some of them were shoved into the obscure corners of my mind, which crept out when I learnt to deal with them. All these now find way into my books, making a natural spring of emotional resilience.


 Most of your writing and poetry is based on human emotions and inspirational and uplifting prose. What inspires your poetry?


Probably I am too sensitive and intuitive. Even small incidents of misery, oppression, injustice, discrimination and violence around me pursue my thoughts till I decant them into words of my choice. Emotions have imprisoned me, ruled me and tried to smother me but I channelized them and poured them into my poetry. A somber solace pervades around me now!

When I published my first book of poetry ‘Sublime Shadows Of Life’, I sent it to my friends. One of my school friends who had not been in touch with me rang me up and asked me – ‘is everything ok in your life?’ When I replied in affirmative, she said she got worried as many of my poems are submerged in grief!


You write with such depth and knowing of the human psyche. Did your background in education involve studies in psychology, or did you accumulate your insights from observing and your own experiences?


I could never get the opportunity to choose Psychology as a subject of study though I would have loved to delve deeper into human psyche through a systematic study. Most of my insights and perceptions were gathered from observation and analysis of people who meet us in various garbs and gears. The study of Literature, discussion of diverse characters and their motives, critical analysis of poetry and drama must have developed my interest and ability.

I have spent a major chunk of my life amongst youngsters of the age group 15 – 17 years; their intrepid and unassuming reactions, their idealism, aspirations and their buoyant, ever-inspiring energy further honed my skills of getting into the skin of various kinds of people around us.


When do you think was the pivotal point in your life that inspired you to begin writing books?


There comes a point in life when we discover we have plenty of time, when you arrive at a station, which welcomes you with your solitude and inspires you to start afresh, when one phase of life gets over and you realize you have a lot inside you…that was my point of awakening. My girls flew away overseas for further study and a deluge of emotional outburst resulted in my first poetry book. One of my friends told me ‘this is just the tip of the iceberg!’ It was indeed!


What advice would you give us about how we can work to free our souls from emotional, negative chains that keep us bound to people that aren’t bringing any positivity to our lives?


Negative and emotional chains are very subtle and deceptive. They absorb more energy and often walk away victorious, testing our patience and strength yet they ennoble us, tame our ego, thereby transforming us into humble human beings. However hard you try, you wont be able to knock negativity out of your lives. You have to deal with it – self-talk, introspection, detachment and writing your reactions down often helps.

All those hurts, the agony, the emotional throttling gets assuaged when we pour it out, when we weave a wreath of words to be placed on those buried memories, when we share it in the form of a poem, a story or a book that we write. Freedom starts the moment we pen down our thoughts. We feel relieved. We learn to forgive. We rise above human imperfections.


What advice would you like to share with us about building and maintaining healthy, emotional relationships?


I have written a book about ‘Emotional Truths of Relationships’…here is an excerpt that answers your question:

Relationships have to be nurtured slowly and carefully, their brittleness is felt only when they are on the verge of falling apart. Take care of the words you use. They act like arrows, words spoken in anger or frustration cause deep wounds, which never heal. It may not be always easy to control your rancor but prudent are those who think before they speak.

Many loving relationships break up due to arrogance of establishing supremacy, whether it is your spouse or sibling. If you think you have the capability to control, you are seriously mistaken. Self-respect and freedom is dear to all.

When we pretend to be loving and affectionate but our actions and words are not in consonance with what we pose to be, such relationships never grow well. Do you think people are so dumb that they can’t see through your sham? If you expect others to respect you, don’t forget they too expect the same. Hurting their self-esteem can boomerang. Lack of respect for each other is a slow slayer of relationships!

We all possess human frailties, which are either inherent or picked up from the environment. Nobody is born perfect…we learn from each other. All we need is the will to improve our relationships.

Blaming our past or our parents who could not give us the best of this world will not make us better human beings. Our own efforts would.


 Your book, Allow Yourself To Be a Better Person offers much insight on traits and habits of our personalities in which many are formed from our backgrounds and upbringings, shedding light on how we can overcome the negative traits and build a more stable and happier sense of self. Would you please share an excerpt with us?


Sure! Here is an excerpt from my latest book:


There was a time when I never gave a thought to becoming a better person as I considered myself to be ‘the best.’ Probably we all think like that!

At the threshold of youth, we are too vain and self-centered, living in the world of our dreams and friends…a blessed domain of self-absorption, of freedom… devoid of any fetters that link us to societal norms.

Then I came across William Faulkner’s observation: “Always dream and shoot higher than you know you can do. Do not bother just to be better than your contemporaries or predecessors. Try to be better than yourself.”

Better than myself? But ‘I am the best,’ I told myself!

The arrogance of this thought hit me hard when I met my husband. I hardly knew him as he was ushered into my life as a prospective groom who had been chosen for me. I was told ‘he is the best!’

But that is another story.

I am glad I soon realized that we all have some imperfections, which we refuse to reflect on.

I discovered that each personality could be enhanced. I learned that self-enhancement is the dream of almost all people…areas may differ.

I also learnt that what holds us back is our own ego, which talks to us in hyperboles.

We can only become a better person if we have the inclination and the resolve, only if we accept that life is a learning curve and all experiences add something to our personality.


Debbie, I would like to extend my gratitude to you for providing me this awesome opportunity of sharing my works with you. I love your benevolence and amiable nature of taking such an initiative.


Thank you Balroop for coming here today to share some of yourself and your work. I’m sure your writing is inspirational for people of all ages, we are never too old to get in touch with our higher selves. It was a pleasure having you here to spread your wisdom by sharing with others.


Connect with Balroop:


You can visit my blog at:

Let’s connect:

Visit all of Balroop’s books at her Amazon Author Page

Sunday Book Review – Allow Yourself To Be A Better Person – Balroop Singh

Book reviews by D.G. Kaye

Today’s book review is about a wonderful book, Allow Yourself To Be A Better Person by talented and rich in wisdom, author and friend, Balroop Singh. This is a book full of wonderful inspiration and with help from the author’s guidance teaches us to be inspired with reminders of gratitude and how to erase the negativity within ourselves and live in positive light.

Allow Yourself To Be A Better Person by Balroop Singh

Get this Book on Amazon! 




Do you think you are a good person? Would you like to meet your better self? Welcome to the vast vistas that this book unravels before you by highlighting the shaded areas that could never get your attention.

Enhancement of personality is a long process, which starts only when we acknowledge the need for it. Often we detest looking at our imperfections and if somebody is professionally successful, the thought doesn’t even strike.
This book enlightens you about the goodness, which lies dormant within us till we make an effort to explore it. It exhorts you to introspect and accept natural human failings. It guides you towards the metamorphosis that could make you an endearing personality.


My 5 Star Review:


Singh shares her knowledge and wisdom with us in this book of personal growth, showing us how to develop inner stability, self-love, self-esteem and self-love by learning to turn the negatives within ourselves into positives. These are the first steps we take which lead us to fulfilling new avenues.

Often the simpler things we often take for granted are God’s greatest gifts to us. The author demonstrates how to overcome emotions such as anger and arrogance and why it’s important to let go of past hurts while showing us the way to find forgiveness. The sum of our experiences build our personalities, but negative emotions within us can be changed. This book is a wonderful self-help book in the journey to finding fulfillment within. You can improve your life with Singh’s gentle reminders for your soul to thrive in harmony.


Visit Balroop Singh’s author page on Amazon to view all her inspiration books!

Memoir Bytes – Miss Toronto 1926 – My Grandmother

Memoir Bytes:

Vision perception


I’ve written a lot in my books about my relationship with my mother and had touched on tidbits about her mother, my grandmother Dorothy who died shortly after my mother’s 15th birthday .


My mother had a knack for ‘expanding the truth’ whenever she chose to share a snippet of her life, so as I got older and caught on to her delusional stories, I had to do my own searching around for truth, mostly from my aunts while they were still living. But luckily, my sister-in-law, Katy, is a great FBI sleuth herself. She obviously found our erratic and dysfunctional family history fascinating when she married my brother and conducted her own search and found out much more than even I was told.


One story in particular was about my grandmother apparently, winning the very first Miss Toronto Beauty Contest in 1926 held at Sunnyside Amusement Park. Pictured below is my grandmother standing as a runner up to the far right. The story told to me by mother was that her mother had actually won the contest and was deemed the first Miss Toronto until she was disqualified and became a runner up when it was discovered that she was married when she entered. This of course turned out to be another lie my mother loved to boast about because of course if her mother didn’t win, there had to be a reason. In the photo my grandmother was 21 years old. (Late correction, either the newspaper got it wrong, or my grandmother fibbed about her age because she was only 17 in the pageant)

Miss Toronto beauty pageant 1926
My grandmother, Dorothy (nee) Asling , far right, sporting a bob hairdo. Photo was sent to me from the Toronto Star Newspaper.


Back in the day, being skinny wasn’t a factor required to either enter or win a beauty contest. And despite my mother telling her tall tales, anybody who knew my grandmother had told me she was considered a striking beauty. In fact, Katy sent me this article clipping from an interview the Toronto Star did with my grandmother before the final competition when it was down to 5 contestants.


This is all I know of my grandmother, from how she spoke in the article interview in this post I can almost hear that little air in her voice that my mother had of herself. Dorothy was apparently a very popular girl who had many men vying for her attention, and although she tried to sound modest and naive in this article, I could hear my own mother in her words, particularly in the paragraph where the journalist seemed to detect the same thing when they thought Dorothy knew well that this would be printed.

Dorothy Asling interview Miss Toronto 1926 Article interview with Dorothy Asling from Toronto Star Newspaper August 16, 1926, journalist unknown. From the archives.


I’ve heard so many controversial stories about the life of my grandmother and have had to make my own deductions from comparing versions of stories my mother told me and relaying them back to my aunts for verification and authentic versions. Apparently, my grandmother was a real live wire, who, according to this article, may not have smoked, but loved to drink, party and gamble. She was the life of all parties, and the complete opposite of what I know of my grandfather, who was meek and mild mannered, and a very handsome man. Dorothy was the love of his life and he never married again because he never stopped loving her.


I notice similarities in Dorothy’s physical stature to my mother and some of her siblings.


My mother was a dark beauty like her mother and she even had the same mole on her left cheek, which she emphasized with a black kohl eyeliner as it appears her mother did too. Back when I was a child I remembered that mole as my mother’s ‘signature’ beauty mark.


Another prominent feature of my grandmother was her ‘thick’ upper arms. I wrote in humor in my book, Menowhat? A Memoir, about the women in our family nicknamed ‘the arm family’, which I had crowned the name to all of us – sister, female cousins and aunts, because no matter how slim any of us could be, we all had thick upper arms. Thank you grandmother Dorothy, not.


I’ve never seen another photo of my grandmother other than this photo that my Aunty Sherry ordered copies of years ago from our Toronto newspaper to give one to each of her nieces. So naturally, I’ve looked at it a million times and analyzed the heck out of it.


My sister-in-law Katy had done research on my family tree and had obtained copies of my mother’s lineage when she got curious about the ongoing lie my mother had told me and stood true to till the day she died, that I wasn’t conceived out of wedlock, and that her mother was Jewish. In fact, Katy had given me a copy of my parents’ marriage licence she obtained, confirming my suspicion that my mother was indeed 2 months pregnant with me when she married my father. I was also flabberghasted to find that in the little box where they tick off and state their religion, my grandmother was born and raised as a Baptist. I’d already obtained confirmation from my aunts on these factors, but looking at the actual document was a confirming piece of my family history.


There were so many tales spun by my mother to create dramatic effect to every story she told. And still, I truly believe her stories were not only to attract wow factors or sympathy, but also that she had spent her life creating stories to the point where I honestly believe she believed her own stories. She had such a dire need to be more than what she was.


Below are a few photos I plucked out of an old photo album – the women in my life as well as 2 more clippings of Dorothy that my sister-in-law managed to get copies of.



D.G. Kaye at 2 yrs old
Me at 2 years old. I’m thinking the look on my face says something about my mood and environment.


My mother at my Sweet 16
The ‘dark’ beauty, my mother at my Sweet 16


Me and Aunty Shirley my Sweet 16
My hero, my beautiful Aunty Sherry (Shirley) at my Sweet 16 having a toast together


My beautiful Aunty Lee
My beautiful Aunty Lee at my Sweet 16


Dorothy Asling Miss Toronto runner up
Dorothy Asling my grandmother, 2nd from the right.


Dorothy Asling interviewed

A ‘popular entry’ Dorothy Asling


Sadly, all I know of my grandmother is from these articles, and they are the only photos I’ve ever seen of her. Had she not been a beauty contestant, I wouldn’t even know what she looked like.




Rejection: the Ultimate Teacher – Guest Post by author Tina Frisco… | Chris The Story Reading Ape’s Blog

Reblog and featuring


Friend and author Tina Frisco has written a beautiful piece for The Story Reading Ape’s blog about how we deal with rejection. In her article she explains how we perceive rejection and how to analyze our emotions in order to look at rejection taking into consideration the source and how to overcome the negative feelings we absorb from rejection.


Rejection comes in many forms, from many places, and is very painful. What makes rejection so devastating? What causes us to react in a particular way? How can we use rejection to our advantage?

On a purely instinctual level, rejection threatens to extinguish our life force by depriving us of vital nourishment. No being can truly thrive without some measure of love and acceptance.

Rejection devastates when we attach our personal worth to someone or something outside of ourselves. Feeling worthy only when liked and accepted by those with whom we engage sets the stage for rejection.

When feeling disliked or ignored by another, it’s wise to step back and view that person’s behavior as a mirror our own subconscious. Often the things we don’t like in ourselves are reflected back to us by others, giving us an opportunity to examine what prompts us to react and how we might change. This not only buffers the impact, but also opens the door to personal growth. Becoming the witness rather than the recipient allows us to determine if our behavior rather than our essence is being rejected, or if the other person’s bias in play, and/or if we’re simply misreading all the cues. Continue Reading

Source: Rejection: the Ultimate Teacher – Guest Post by author Tina Frisco… | Chris The Story Reading Ape’s Blog



More wisdom on the universe by Mira Prabhu, and her explanation of the misconception people have of the renknowned ‘The Secret’. As Mira shares, there is much more to manifesting our desires than just thinking if we focus on winning a million dollars, it doesn’t just magically appear. Have a read of this fascinating article:



‘The Secret’—a ‘spiritual’ self-help documentary launched in Australia in 2006—hit the Western world with incredible impact, generating millions for its producers. I wrote the following article a year or so later but never published it. Today, although a thousand other scams have rushed in to take its place, the reasons why I reacted so negatively to it are still pertinent. The plethora of gross misinformation spreading across our planet has inspired me to write spiritual fiction, and all three of my novels in the MOKSHA TRILOGY (Whip of the Wild God, Krishna’s Counsel and Copper Moon Over Pataliputra—Whip is out and the other two novels are soon to be published) deal with the great eastern truths that helped me come to grips with reality.) So here goes….Continue Reading




Source: THE DIRTY LITTLE SECRET | mira prabhu

#Women’s Health Week Revisited – #Heart Health – Connecting the Dots by D.G. Kaye | Smorgasbord – Variety is the spice of life



Sally Cronin revisiting some worthy health information in her Health Series. Today’s post is about Heart Health, where Sally has featured my story.


Women’s Health Week Revisited – Heart Health – Connecting the Dots by D.G. Kaye


Welcome to the women’s health week revisited and I am so pleased that author D.G. Kaye accepted my invitation to guest post last year. She shared her story about a health issue that could have gone unnoticed at great risk to her life. Thankfully she is now fully recovered and definitely firing on all cylinders.



I became fascinated by a tiny red dot on my right forearm. Months had gone by and I was puzzled as to why it was still there, so I kept mental note of it every time I glanced it. I just found it strange that this tiny red, transparent speck had taken up residence on my arm and wouldn’t go away. It never hurt, nor itched; it was just there.

I followed my intuition and decided to take action. Ironically, this wasn’t the first call to action. I had previously shown it to my husband’s Dermatologist two months prior, and he offered to burn it off. He was a very old gentleman, and I had mentioned to my husband that I thought this doctor was ready for retirement, as he didn’t see very well. He never used a microscope and seemed always too eager to burn things off. I didn’t feel at peace with the issue so I wanted to seek a second opinion.

I made an appointment with a new Dermatologist who came highly recommended in August 2005. I had to wait until January of the following year to see him. When January rolled around, I went to the appointment and I was told that the doctor I was to see was off sick and that I would be passed over to one of his associates; Dr. Allen (name changed.)

When I met Dr. Allen, I sensed her compassion immediately. She made me feel comfortable with her warm smile and her soft-spoken manner. She informed me that she was going to cut out the dot and send it to pathology; her standard procedure. Dr. Allen stated that she didn’t believe it was anything serious, but as a precaution she wanted to have it analyzed. I was satisfied that I had somebody competent now looking after me. Dr. Allen informed me the results would take about two weeks. Two weeks later . . .Continue Reading

Source: Women’s Health Week Revisited – Heart Health – Connecting the Dots by D.G. Kaye | Smorgasbord – Variety is the spice of life

STORIES OF #COURAGE & #SURVIVAL– #ABUSE — Women of Wisdom Series™ |


Dorothy Sanders is a memoir writer. Her blog Aging Abundantly is a place she shares her thoughts and wisdom on life and notable changes  and gratitudes, – changes in attitudes, growth, experience and how experiences affect the choices we continue to make after fifty.


About Dorothy:




I write to put words to the feelings, truth, and intuitions that live within me, to find answers to life’s most pressing questions and to share what I discover along the way with those who are searching and /or suffering. I share my words, my discoveries, my thought processes, and my love and support  through articles, books, workshops and one-on-one coaching.  As I continue to search for my voice, my truth, my raison d’être, I love to share my journey and support others who are doing the same. Read more about Dorothy HERE 

Dorothy has started a new series, Voices of Wisdom, where   she has invited several memoir writers, including myself, to share some of our own wisdoms on subjects that became important in our lives. You can read my contribution Here.


Recently, Dorothy has written a beautiful article on memoir writers, and how our words have the power to encourage others who resonate with the emotional and physical abuse that we share in our stories, offering hope to the many who have yet to find their voice or claim their power. I was honored and humbled to find that me and my book Conflicted Hearts was chosen to add to her article, and I was deeply moved by her synopsis of my story. Please have a look at this article below.

“As part of The Women of Wisdom Series™, I am introducing three memoirs, each addressing the issue of abuse. Though the stories are different, the message is in many ways the same.  Each memoir sheds light on the impact of abuse on us and provides lessons in survival. The women describe their journeys from a place of strength and courage, characteristics they undoubtedly honed through their difficulties.


These women are people just like you and I and what I love about memoirs. Thanks to modern technology, and the increase of Indy Publishing, we are able to see into the lives of everyday people  It’s so exciting  that women are stepping up, one by one, and sharing their stories. They benefit from the telling, we benefit from the listening.


We all can learn from an author with a compelling story to tell. It doesn’t matter whether or not the book is worthy of a literary award. What matters is what we take away. . . Continue Reading

I want to share here, the beautiful statement Dorothy wrote regarding my book Conflicted Hearts:


CONFLICTED HEARTS:  A Daughter’s Quest for Solace from Emotional Guilt by D.G. Kaye


Conflicted Hearts Cover SMALL revised

“A girl’s relationship with her mother lasts a lifetime, but it is often not until we reach midlife that the complexity of a difficult connection comes into focus. What we come to believe about ourselves as adults through our interactions with our mother’s as children, is often not an accurate reflection of who we really are. This conflict, this inner disparity, either drives us toward disintegration or the truth.

D.G. Kaye took on this battle. In her book, Conflicted Hearts, she shares her story as she struggles to come to terms with her challenging and complex relationship with a mother she both loved and despised. It is a journey that all of us can relate to in one way or another. Kaye writes with honesty, candor, humor and courage as she peels back the layers and gains understanding and perspective. In the end we not only learn about the author, we learn about ourselves and may even come to see our own mother/daughter relationship a more clearly.

Sit down with a cup of coffee or tea, and enjoy this journey into one woman’s world. When you put down the book, you will feel as though you’ve gained a friend.”

As a memoir writer, I can honestly say writing in this genre is often difficult.  There are days when I have to walk away from writing to put my head in a different space, like coming up for air. I began writing Conflicted Hearts after years of journaling about my life, and consequently it led to writing a sequel, P.S. I Forgive You, a closure to that part of my life that existed within me for most of my life, written after my mother’s eventual death. But through the writing, it became a release of the emotional pain, and the best part about sharing pain and learning how to overcome is the reward that comes along with it. It’s inspiring to find that I have helped others in some small way, others who have endured similar paths with their own emotionally abused issues. We are not alone. And together we have the power to lift and enlighten one another and those who’ve yet to find the courage to walk away from what doesn’t serve them as healthy.


Visit Dorothy’s books 


Source: STORIES OF COURAGE & SURVIVAL– ABUSE — Women of Wisdom Series™ |