
Scars – My Entry for Charli Mills’ Carrot Ranch Flash Fiction (Nonfiction)
This was my second entry for Charli Mills’ Carrot Ranch Flash Fiction (Nonfiction) Rodeo Contest. It was a double-header 99 words no more or less times 2.
The topic – Scars – was inspired by a quote by Stephen King – whose book on writing should be read, I believe, by all aspiring writers. He wrote “Writers remember everything … especially the hurts. Strip a writer to the buff, point to the scars, and he’ll tell you the story of each small one. From the big ones you get novels. A little talent is a nice thing to have if you want to be a writer, but the only real requirement is the ability to remember the story of every scar.” Entries were to show a remembered scar using any genre the writer chose in 198 words.
You can read more about the contest and see some entries over at Charli’s Carrot Ranch
Forbidden Passion
Our eyes met and locked with desire. A whirlwind of wining, dining, and dancing kept our hearts riding on the crest of passion. When his fingertips held my face, it left imprints of electric shocks into the depths of never-ending want while I’d gaze into his big, soulful eyes.
The way he said my name increased the rhythm of my heart. When we danced we became one, and our hearts joined in an unstoppable, pulsating desire. No words of love were ever spoken to complicate our romance, yet we both knew, we understood within.
Harsh reality set in after that magical year we shared, much longer than we’d both anticipated. One night, one look in his once smiling eyes showed the happiness was stripped from his soul. We remained in a desperate embrace dancing our last dance before the sacrifice.
His lips parted with pain, spilling the words “I love you, but I can’t be completely yours.” Our lips so close we shared the same oxygen as our tears melded, tasting each other’s brine. His hand squeezing mine so tight, his wedding ring embedded my palm. The music stopped, we parted, each leaving with half the other’s heart.
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59 Comments
Smorgasbord - Variety is the Spice of Life.
Wow that is powerful Debby… brilliant piece of Flash fiction.. felt every emotion.. you need to do more..♥
dgkaye
Thanks so much Sal – so not really my wheelhouse so thanks for the encouragement. You never know, there may be more down the road – New genre – Flash Nonfiction LOL 🙂 <3
Charli Mills
Yes! We accept BOTS as flash fiction at the Ranch, and fiction allows for embellishments to any non fiction. I hope you get hooked because I’d love to read more from you!
dgkaye
Thanks Charli. I plan on joining in more. 🙂 xx
Smorgasbord - Variety is the Spice of Life.
I think that might fall under a different category all together!!! ♥
dgkaye
Maybe a new genre! 🙂 xx
Stevie Turner
Enjoyed reading this one Debby!
dgkaye
Thanks Stevie. 🙂
Annika Perry
I love how you went for the emotional scar with your story, Debby! A great read, full of passion, romance and angst – and of course the twist at the end! Brilliant.
dgkaye
Thanks Annika. Again, out of my comfort zone but glad I entered. 🙂 xx
Annika Perry
It didn’t come across at all…seemed so fluid and reassured!
dgkaye
Wow, thank you so much for that Annika. 🙂 <3
marianbeaman
What a wild ride, Debby. I have scars too but none of this variety – ha!
dgkaye
Taken from the pages of my first book Marian. 🙂
Jacqui Murray
Oh that’s powerful, Deb. I hope it isn’t true. It’s way too sad.
dgkaye
Thank you Jacquie. It was a very long time ago. In fact there was a chapter in my first book, Conflicted Hearts. 🙂
shehannemoore
I would say the writing of a weapon Debby. Well done lady x
dgkaye
Lol, I would say you’re too much, but never enough!!! LOL. Hope you’re on the mend my Lovely. <3 xxxx
Charli Mills
Beautiful and powerfully evocative flash, Debby!
dgkaye
Thank you so much Charli. A big compliment from you. 🙂 x
D. Wallace Peach
Wonderful, Debby. Such romance and then such heartbreak. You captured all that swirling emotion beautifully. I’m so glad you shared this and would love to read more! Keep it up. <3
dgkaye
Thanks for the kudos Diana. Sometimes I surprise myself when getting out of my comfort zone.I think I’ll be doing more of this in the coming year. 🙂 <3
D. Wallace Peach
Oh good. I’ll be sure to read every one. 🙂
dgkaye
Aw, thank you so much Diana 🙂 xx
olganm
Great writing and very brave. Thanks for sharing, Debby.
dgkaye
Thank you Olga 🙂 x
robbiesinspiration
Wonderful, Debby. So very full of deep emotion.
dgkaye
Thanks so much Robbie. It was certainly different writing for me. 🙂
Colleen Chesebro
OHHH… a sexy flash fiction! Good one, Sis! <3
dgkaye
LOL thanks Sis! 🙂 <3
John Maberry
Yup, that was very flashy, there, cowgirl! 😎
dgkaye
LOL John. 🙂 😉
Adele Marie
oh wow, Debby, what a beautiful but heart breaking story. xxx
dgkaye
Thanks so much Adele. I”m really astounded at the feedback my little attempt at FF is receiving. 🙂 <3
Adele Marie
It’s good and it jogged my heart strings other peoples too. Perhaps, you could do more? <3
dgkaye
Thanks so much Adele. I think I will do more come the new year. <3
Adele Marie
Yes, I hope so. <3
dgkaye
<3
Tina Frisco
It’s amazing how a short read can evoke an overpowering response. I wanted to shake the guy and give him a lecture on what an idiot he was for walking away! Fantastic, Deb. You’re breaching new horizons ❤
dgkaye
LOL T, thanks for the kudos my sweet friend! I think I am branching out. Oh, and, as for the guy, he’s still eating his heart out! <3 :) ;)
Tina Frisco
Welcome, Deb. As for the guy … That’ll teach him!!! ❤
dgkaye
LMAO T <3
writerchristophfischer
Wow, powerful. <3
dgkaye
Thank you so much Christoph <3
Kate Johnston
Nice job!!
dgkaye
Oh thanks so much Kate. 🙂
Darlene
Excellent piece of writing, Debby. Sometimes the fewer words, the better story. Well done.
dgkaye
Thank you so much Darlene. I think I’ll be trying more of these in the new year. 🙂
Hugh's Views and News
Such a powerful piece of writing, Debby. It even had me reaching for the box of tissues, and I never cry about anything.
dgkaye
Wow! Stoked coming from you Hugh. But really, you never cry?? I find that hard to believe from such a sensitive soul <3 <3
Hugh's Views and News
It’s true, Debby. John cries at everything – even the movie E.T, but I’m always hard faced. He can’t understand it. It’s very rare my tear-ducts are opened, although it did once happen when the dentist gave me an injection just above my two front teeth. It was like having a pencil shoved up my nose. Since I discovered that chewing gum at the same time as peeling onions also stop the tears, I don’t even cry when peeling them anymore. These days, the only time I cry is when laughing a lot. That always produces tears. 😂
dgkaye
Ok, well at least laughter brings happy tears! And sorry, but I laughed out loud at your description of pencil shoved up nose LOL. And come on, who didn’t cry at E.T.????? And so, well I’m glad to know now that my post moved you!!!! <3 :)
Norah
Wow! That’s some scar, Debby. Those broken relationships always leave a scar or two. This reads so differently from Twenty Years: After I Do 😊
dgkaye
Thanks Norah. Thank goodness it reads different, I was much younger then. 🙂
Norah
Thank goodness indeed! 🙂
dgkaye
🙂
Carol Balawyder
Debby, wow! What a powerful story! <3
dgkaye
Thanks Carol. My first stab at Flash Nonfiction. I may dabble in it more this year. 🙂 <3
Carol Balawyder
You should! <3