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Smorgasbord Blog Magazine – D. G. Kaye Explores the Realms of Relationships – June 2020 -June 2020 – Empaths and Spiritual Communication through Energy | Smorgasbord Blog Magazine

I’m over at Sally Cronin​’s Smorgasbord Blog Magazine with my June edition of Realms of Relationships column. In this issue I’m talking about communication through intuitive knowing – #Empathy.


Smorgasbord Blog Magazine – D. G. Kaye Explores the Realms of Relationships – June 2020 – Empaths and Spiritual


D.G. Kaye on Relationships


Welcome to the June edition of the Realms of Relationships. Today, I’m writing off course about a different kind of communication – through energy. Perhaps it’s these crazy times we’re all living in, but for people who are Highly Sensitive Persons, also known as HSPs, and for those of us who are empaths with similar traits, I’ve found these last few months, and in particular these last few weeks of world-wide protests for justice, weighing me down with a heavier than usual load to carry, emotionally.

For us sensitives, we are uber sensitive to the energies emitted when the hurt in the world becomes insurmountable. For empaths and HSPs, we don’t necessarily have to be directly in front of one person to pick up energies. We can also take in the collective. And I can tell you, absorbing too much of the negativity going on in the world can be very affecting.

Empaths are ultra-compassionate people, and it’s no surprise that we are feeling way too much in this time of the world.

You may be thinking I’ve gone off the beaten path here, talking about empaths today, but I tagged this column Realms of Relationships because in order for any relationship to flourish and thrive, there must be good communication. And when it comes to communication, an empath – receiver of messages through alternate methods of communication, has good experience understanding communication.




The question has often been asked – what is an empath, and what makes empathy different from sympathy? So today I’m going to break it down.

Empaths can literally feel the emotions of another. An inner-knowing through a feeling of invisibly transmitted energy, is how I’d explain it. I suspect every empath has their own unique abilities how they receive messages, just as many sensitive people, including psychics and mediums, feel spirit with one particular sense.

For example, I can sense when spirits are around me by a sudden drop in my body temperature to downright shivering, no matter the degrees it is in the room. I also sense spirit by scent. I don’t see or hear ghosts, but I sense their presence when the room I’m in suddenly begins to feel very chilly to the point that my teeth chatter as the rest of me shivers. I can smell a distinct odor of Export A cigarette smoke just as I always did when my father entered a room and when he now visits me from ‘the other side’. I get the same feeling when a mysterious waft of a certain sweet scent of perfume fills the air when my Aunty Sherry pays me a visit. Not surprisingly, I’m the only one who can smell these visitors if I’m not alone.

But I digress, I was talking about receiving empathic messages before I got lost on the ghostly messages, lol. My superpower? I like to say, I read souls. I can read and feel emotions – yes, goodness, anger, sadness, evil and every emotion in between. It’s not always a good thing, that’s for sure, but it does come in handy for sizing up situations. How to explain?


empath communication


How does an empath absorb the emotions of others?

 I can only speak from my own experience, and the best way I can explain it is – In person, it only takes a few minutes for me to sense emotions from looking through the eyes – beyond the eyes, into the soul, so to speak. Body language and words also transmit energy. Certainly, we’ve all heard some of the old clichés like – ‘the air was so thick you could cut it with a knife’. That example of thickened air is a good indicator of what an empath picks up on whenever encountering negative energy. Empaths can feel the emotions given off by others. Like I previously mentioned, I would describe it as an energy transmission – communication through absorbed energy.

I am like a sponge or a Bounty paper towel, and have therefore, learned through the years, where to keep myself away from to avoid absorbing certain energies from attracting to me. Again, hard to explain, but I’m sure almost everyone has had a superstitious moment in life where we’re convinced there is a black cloud hanging over us, or have once felt that someone has cast an evil spell on us or maybe we just plain feel like bad luck is surrounding us. These examples are what an empath feels when we pick up negative energies about a person. And that person doesn’t have to be physically in our presence for energies to bounce off us. And not to mislead anyone, empaths pick up both good and bad energies – no discrimination. It’s just that attracting the negative energies are harder to repel. And it’s no surprise when an empath is accused of being ‘moody’ that an energy can certainly have us changing our minds like the wind – just ask my husband!

A good example of picking up collective energies is when we’re watching the news. There really is no good news on the news and by watching too much sadness, our energies become ‘empathetic’ to the pain and sadness of others. My heart gets heavy and my concentration is shot as my heart prefers to lead my mood. Just as when we’re around a celebration and our hearts are full, we’re going to feel joyful because that is what surrounds us. And those good energies are like refueling from being drained from other bad energies. It’s a cycle for an empath, but there are ways to help deter attracting those energies by learning how to shield.

Empathy is different from sympathy in that having sympathy is more of an offering of condolence as we may feel sorry for someone because of their loss, but we do not feel that person’s actual grief as an empath can by taking in the griever’s actual feelings and emotions. Our own bodies can feel the pain of others – walking precisely in their shoes.
Some may think it must be so cool to have this ability, but honestly, I’d rather not have it. Being an empath isn’t something we typically train to become, but rather, it’s an inherent or unconscious developed trait. Psychics, spiritualists, witches, and earth angels are more notoriously known for having empathic abilities, but one doesn’t have to be any one of these in order to be an empath.

Being an empath is sometimes referred to as ‘a gift’, but it’s not always a gift. Many people are empathic. And many more may be but are not aware of their ‘gift’, and some are often hindered by it.

It’s been asked many times, does one just become an empath? Is it inherited? Is it learned? Well, I’ve heard various takes on the subject, but one thought of interest stuck out to me: Some empaths don’t realize that their desire to help others sometimes stems from a lack of nurturing as a child, resulting in an unconscious need to help others. I think that’s just one possible method of how a person can be transformed into an empath subconsciously, and despite there being a ‘how to’ for almost anything available, my personal feeling is that teaching someone to be empathic would be like trying to teach someone to become a psychic. We can read all we want about the subject and watch Youtube videos, and gain lots of insight from doing so, but one cannot simply just ‘become’ an empath or a psychic. Dr. Judith Orloff, Psychiatrist at explains how genetics and trauma can aid in playng a part in becoming an empath, in her article where she explains this a little further

What’s it like being an empath? Well, let’s say you’re watching a depressing movie or reading a sad part of a book and your feelings are touched by what you’re reading and/or watching. You may be feeling anger, disgust, elation or any other emotion from that movie or book. The writer of the story has done a great job of painting a story and bringing the characters to life when they can evoke these emotions and the reader is drawn in and can almost feel what the character is experiencing. For an empath, we don’t require someone to narrate their feelings to us, we sense and feel the emotion. Sure, if someone shares something affecting that happened to them, I can immediately take in how they’re feeling as a result of that incident, often no words are required. It’s a vibe and energy someone gives off and that energy is transmitted into their personal space. An empath only has to look into someone’s eyes to pick up on emotion – unspoken emotions. There is definitely more than meets the eye, to quote an old cliché – ‘the eyes are the windows of the soul’, because they definitely are.

An empath is a receptor for the energy. Someone not as sensitive to these energies wouldn’t be an empath, and subsequently, wouldn’t even be able to take notice of someone around them with a hidden emotional issue unless they were informed. And sadly, it’s sometimes difficult for an empath to shield or shutdown so as not to absorb these energies. Shielding is a protective measure that is learned, it’s the virtual putting up of an invisible wall to repel the energies to keep them from penetrating into us. With that I’ll add that one doesn’t have to be an empath to learn how to shield themselves.

Empaths are usually open targets for  energy vampires (suckers) because we take in other people’s energies. Our compassion can sometimes exhaust us when we encounter too much needy energy at one time. Needy doesn’t necessarily always mean the vampire is intentionally reaching out to us, but, because we are susceptible to other people’s energies and feelings – means we can sense the needy energies. We receive the feelings through energy. This is the reason I refer to these types of people as vampires – because they suck out and overwhelm our own energies as we begin feeling their pain or sadness.


energy transmission


Don’t forget, an empath can experience happy emotions too, not just the bad and the sad, but experiencing happy and good emotions do not drain us. In fact, they can be quite uplifting. That’s why happy people are so good for the soul. And negative people drain our souls.

There are good parts of being an empath – despite an empath’s ability to attract others’ negative energy, sometimes having that uncanny ability of reading a person’s soul through looking into their eyes, can also come in handy for staying safe and sensing oncoming trouble ahead.

Just as a fine- tuned intuition will save us from making many wrong moves, an ability to be able to learn people’s intentions through looking in their eyes can help us avoid – or at least, prepare us to avoid danger. My internal alert system flashes before me if I’m in close proximity to something scary. If I’m out in public and find myself in a situation among undesirable people, or feeling a little too close for comfort, I have an early chance of escape.

I’ll observe people when they aren’t watching and look into their eyes at an opportune moment. If there’s an exchange of words, I’ll check if a smile is genuine (an empath knows). Eyes speak, so does an ominous silence – like a smile without matching smiling eyes. But I would have to say my finest tuned skill as an empath is attracting people’s sadness. My empathy is my Achille’s Heel. It may not be that someone is intentionally in my energy space, but my radar picks up on those energies. As I mentioned earlier, we don’t have to actually be in a room with someone to pick up the energy, just as we could be watching something on TV that transmits those same energies. For a seasoned empath, we can also read energies from the written word – some things like a commonly used phrase – reading between the lines, reading ‘behind’ the words that emit the true emotion behind the words.


I’d like to share an example of an experience I had that never leaves me to demonstrate how the energy thing works with me.


The Medium and the broken-hearted woman and my book.


About 10 years ago now, I was invited to a private gathering at my naturopath’s office by my friend Charlene, the then office manager at the clinic. Charlene invited a well-known Medium to come to the clinic to perform readings by picking up energies in the room and afterwards, the group could ask the Medium questions. . . please continue reading at Sally’s blog.


©D.G.Kaye 2020


Source: Smorgasbord Blog Magazine – D. G. Kaye Explores the Realms of Relationships – June 2020 -June 2020 – Empaths and Spiritual Communication through Energy | Smorgasbord Blog Magazine


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D.G. Kaye is a nonfiction/memoir writer, who writes from her own life experiences and self-medicates with a daily dose of humor.


  • Stevie Turner

    I also have the empath ability although not to your level, Debby. I can’t tell by looking into the eyes, but I can just ‘sense’ negative energies and situations. Nobody could ‘read’ my eyes because I cannot take off my sunglasses, lol!

    • dgkaye

      Lol Stevie, I am suspicious of people who don’t take off sunglasses LOL. But I’m not surprised at your empathic abilities. Everybody is different how they receive. Just like the various ways some of us detect spirits around. <3

  • Norah Colvin

    I found your article very interesting, Debby. We do try to teach children empathy which, as you say, is more than just sympathy. However, I think being an empath is more than having empathy as well. You have described the differences quite clearly. I can see that being an empath would have benefits as well as drawbacks.

    • dgkaye

      Thanks so much for reading Norah. I’m glad this resonated with you. I do believe if children grow up in a safe, loving environment and are taught compassion, this would contribute to them developing a sense of empathy. 🙂 x

  • Robbie Cheadle

    I read a series of books which featured two women who were both empaths, Debby. I think it must be difficult to carry such a burden of strong emotion. I am sympathetic, but having read this I don’t get caught up in emotions to this extent.

  • Olga Núñez Miret

    I read your article on Sally’s blog, Debby. I’ve sometimes felt a connection to people I didn’t know and knew what they were feeling, but I’m not a true empath, and just as well, because no matter how well you learn to control it, working as a psychiatrist would have been a nightmare (it was hard enough already). Thanks for the information, Debby. As always, you give us much food for thought.

    • dgkaye

      Hi Olga. Thanks for reading. And no doubts being an empath and a doctor or any variety has to be a double-edged sword. I could never be a doctor for those reasons – can’t even bear to be around tears, let alone sick people. <3

  • Jacqui Murray

    It seems being an empath would be difficult, to feel so much around you when the rest of us can avoid it. I can shut it out when I need to–a dog is hurt, a child is lost–but what if I couldn’t. Very interesting article, Deb.

  • John Maberry

    Amazing stuff here, Deb. I can’t claim to be an empath, but I certainly can read people. Oh yes, the eyes are windows to the soul. The one thing I can see is the life-condition of people. Those who connected to the world, aware, and who have an energy that others don’t. Others who are just more or less walking through life like those on their smartphones risking running into poles.

  • Sue Dreamwalker

    So relate as you know Debby, I left a longer reply over at Sally’s my friend.. <3 Love and Blessings your way and thank you for sharing… So many people need to understand how energies, even the collective, affect them.. <3

  • Colleen M. Chesebro

    Excellent article, Sis. I so enjoy your energy discussions. Since withdrawing from the news and the horrible political carnage on our t.v.’s here in the states, I’m feeling better. I just have to keep distancing myself from the chaos. My writing has helped in so many ways. Love and hugs to you! <3

  • Jane Sturgeon

    Thank you, Sally for running this series and Debby, for another interesting and informative article. We learn to shield and protect, which is a delicate balancing act, so we are not shut down. Not always easy and like you and Colleen, I am grateful for my writing and being out in nature. Solitude helps to re-charge the batteries too sometimes, doesn’t it? I find it gives me a chance to regain my perspective. Hugest hugs to you both. <3 xXx

    • dgkaye

      Hello Lovely. Thanks so much for stopping by. No, shielding is not always easy that’s for sure, something I have to work very hard at. Yes, for many of us, writing is our salvation. Huge hugs back to you Jane. <3 xoxoo

  • Liesbet

    I just hopped over to Sally’s and read your article and experiences. You are a special lady, Debby! Not that I didn’t know that already. That confirmation ten years ago, with the medium, was chilling! It must be such a heavy burden to be an empath, especially these days and especially when watching the news or being involved with people who drain you.

    I always try to put myself in other people’s shoes, but that comes down to understanding their lifestyles, feelings, thoughts, and perceptions for the sake of arguments and discussions. Very different than being an empath. I can only hope that the positive outweigh the negative feelings for you, my friend! XX

    • dgkaye

      Thank you so much for your lovely words Liesbet. It can be quite draining, and shielding is so important to get through the sensitive times. And yes, how you explain yourself and your understanding of people, that is sympathy. You express your genuine feelings for the person with your sympathies, but you don’t necessarily experience internally what they are feeling, which would be ’empathetic’. <3

  • Jane Sturgeon

    Everything is energy isn’t it, my lovely? I think Sue Dreamwalker is in sync when she says that a better understanding of how energies affect us, especially the collective, is needed. Your articles help. Hugest hugs flowing over Our Pond. <3 xXx <3

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