Dear #Spanx – Letting Go -#Self-Esteem

letting go


Dear Spanx,


You’ve left me no alternative but to break up with you. You may appear small, but your mighty powers have stretched my patience. I will not subject myself to your abuse any longer.


You pretended to be my friend by complimenting me when all you were doing was sucking the life out of me. You led me to believe with your hugging and squeezing me we’d be good friends. But you deceived me. Your broken promises to hold me tight in times of need began to smother me. You just wouldn’t let me breathe till I felt as though I was bursting at the seams; gasping for air.


I am breaking free of you now. I will no longer allow you to cause me discomfort and pain. I can’t go on fighting with you every time we get together. You misled me, pretending to shape my self-esteem, yet, I see through your manipulative ways. You give me a compliment, and in the next breath your making fun of me by pinching my unflattering parts, only to create new flabby spots. You can’t fool me anymore. The rolls aren’t going to magically disappear, they only get squished to another location.


I don’t need this expanded version of your dishonesty. My insides are splitting as you persist to maintain your tight grip on me. I’m sorry we couldn’t play nicely together. I no longer wish to be restricted by your confines. I need my freedom. I choose not to use you as a crutch any longer, hiding behind your overbearing shadow.


It’s time for me to bust out and own who I am without needing you or anyone else to support me. I don’t need you to embrace me. I will embrace myself for my courage to walk away from you as I learn to love and appreciate myself for all that I am.


So thanks for all of your support in the past. The time has come to part with things that no longer serve me in kindness and comfort. Your welcome has worn out.




Jesus at the Door


friendshipsThis is another episode about – My friend Mary. This story she told me last week was inspiring and in the spirit of Christmas, I thought the time of year was appropriate to share this story.

Last Sunday Mary was getting ready to go to church, as she tries to make it a weekly habit. Even on the days that Mary doesn’t feel up to going, she makes every effort.

As many of us can relate, the east coast got hit with a boatload of snow last weekend. Mary’s husband was out of town on business and when she stepped outside to get in her car, she found her driveway laden with snow, impossible to get her car out. Mary took it upon herself to begin shoveling her driveway and almost halfway through she found that she could no longer do anymore shoveling. She was exhausted from the weight of the snow, and so she decided that she had given it her best effort and conceded. She resigned herself to the fact that there would be no church that day and went to sit down and make a cup of coffee and thaw out.

As Mary was enjoying her coffee, there was a sudden knock at the door. She went to the door filled with curiosity who it could be given that she wasn’t expecting any company and the inclement weather. There stood a man looking rather tattered and disheveled. He carried in the crook of his arm a shovel. He told her he had walked from the other side of town and was offering to shovel her driveway for whatever amount of money she could spare because he desperately needed to buy some groceries. Mary’s compassion was touched and she felt sorry for the man and gave him some money and bid him God bless, also telling him she didn’t require him to shovel.

When Mary told me this story she said that many others may have closed the door or perhaps thought the stranger was scamming for money but she felt compassion for him and he wasn’t asking for something for nothing in return. She also told me that these kinds of offerings don’t usually happen in her neighborhood. Mary was really puzzled by this visitor. After he left, Mary sat back down in her kitchen and felt bad that she didn’t give him more.  As the day wore on, the stranger’s visit played on Mary’s conscience. Earlier, Mary had felt guilty that she couldn’t make it to church; but later she began to feel if she had gone to church, the stranger may not have received anything from anyone else. Mary then quoted a psalm from the bible to me and as I am not a very religious person, I can’t quite recall it verbatim. But her words were to do with Jesus who went in disguise to strangers seeking kindness and watching to see who were the givers and who would deny him. It was Mary’s revelation that she was snowed in so she would be home for the knock on the door to pay a kindness.

Mary said to me, “Deb, I think Jesus came to my door and I am so glad I was there to fulfill his request.

God bless you Mary.


The Necessary Evils of Self-Promotion | The Daily Dahlia


This is a reblogg from The Daily Dahlia.


I came across this blog awhile ago and I thought it would be a great share for those of you who are entering the new world of self publishing. The post entails lots of good info on ideas for promoting and marketing your book and the dos and don’ts of social media.

The Necessary Evils of Self-Promotion | The Daily Dahlia.