Health and wellness,  That's Life,  THOUGHTS

The Waiting Could Kill You – #Healthcare


tick tock

My hands feel as though they’re roped and tied.


The last update I posted on my documented journey of my husband’s illness, we were off to the naturopath’s office. As always, Dr. Eric was wonderful. He went through all the medical files and gave us some inspiration. He gave my hub some naturopathic remedies, and set up an I.V. therapy program twice a week for him to help build up the important levels of the liver to help it function better.


Although we are hopeful things will take a turn for the better, and the new diuretic hasn’t helped, I also haven’t heard back from the requisition that Dr. B sent to hospital to order my husband another draining by a radiologist, last Wednesday. My hub has gained back all the fluid that was drained at emerge last week, within 4 days. It took all my patience to wait Thursday and Friday for a call, and then pass what felt like a very long weekend as he sits in discomfort, waiting.


I’ve left messages at Dr. B’s office, and emailed him. The phone is always so busy, difficult to get through. I’m pretty well-versed now on the symptoms of this disease, and this fluid build up can potentially become dangerous. If I could just get hub to this damned appointment, I’m going to request a port be inserted in his stomach, so in future, I won’t be at the mercy of the failing health care system.


This procedure has to be done with the aid of an ultra sound in order to see exactly where the fluid is pooling, and to make sure the needle doesn’t go into an organ. My naturopath informed me that if he gets a port put in, that there is a health care service I can call when his fluid builds up, and they’ll come to my home the same day to drain, without needing the ultra sound.


I just cannot comprehend how my husband’s situation isn’t serious enough for the hospital to follow up more closely when it’s a known fact the symptoms of his disease.


I’m beginning to believe more and more about a story a doctor friend told me a few years back — that health care for seniors is not at the forefront of medical system’s bureaucracy. I am beginning to believe that there is some sort of conspiracy in the priority of who gets attended to first.


A glimmer of hope: As I’m writing this, I just received an email reply from Dr. B’s kind secretary. She informed me that the requisition was sent out as we were told, and she has left several messages for that department to try and find out why it’s taking so long, and she said she would keep calling to try and move things forward.


To be continued.

This post is a follow up to the original post #Health #Caregiving and working with the Medical System.

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D.G. Kaye is a nonfiction/memoir writer, who writes from her own life experiences and self-medicates with a daily dose of humor.


  • Sue Vincent

    Not a damned thing I can say except sending hugs and understanding. It is so frustrating to see clearly what needs to be done urgently, be unable to do it yourself and have to wait for the paper-pushers to authorise….x

  • D. Wallace Peach

    How frustrating, Debby. It just goes to show, once again, why advocacy is so very critical. I hope the naturopath’s approach is helpful and produces some good results. Hang in there. Sending hugs and light to you both.

  • marianbeaman

    While you wait, have a cup of tea. I just drank some calming tea with camomile. Even during the day it makes me feel less tense. I’m glad you are open to naturopathic remedies. Here’s hoping you get further resolution by the time you read this message. Hugs to you, Debby. What an marvelous care-giver you are!

    • dgkaye

      Thanks for the kind words and tips Marian. I’ve been working on taxes today while waiting for the call I’ve yet to receive. The tea sounds wonderful and I do have some, so after I feed the hub, I plan on having some and catching up on some blogs before tomorrow and every consecutive day this week is back to doctors and tests. Maybe somewhere in there I’ll find someone to help us. Thanks for your visits and welcome encouragement. 🙂

  • Smorgasbord - Variety is the Spice of Life.

    Thank goodness you have the naturopath on hand too Debby.. it does take some of the strain from your shoulders and certainly having an access port will make a difference. Hopefully to they will come up with a more consistent treatment plan. Building your husband’s own strength up is certainly the right way to go. as always thinking of you with hugs.. XX

    • dgkaye

      Thank you so much Sally for traveling this journey with me. Your friendship and support has meant so much. I shall see what tomorrow brings. xoxo <3 <3

  • Marje @ Kyrosmagica

    That’s dreadful I do hope that he will be well soon it must be so worrying for you Debby. Glad you’ve found a naturopath, hope that helps. I’m a great believer in the value of natural remedies so I do think this is a positive step. Much love and hugs. Marje xx

  • Sacha Black

    Well I loved how this ended, with a glimmer of hope, funny how the universe responds when you are at the end of your tether all of a sudden you hear from an angel who is fighting in your corner with you 🙂 <3

    • dgkaye

      Sach, if it weren’t for my strong faith in my angels, I don’t know how I would have got through this all. Today is a new day and I pray they will come forth. <3

  • Diane Tibert

    Waiting is the worse, especially if you have an active imagination. A lot of horrible things can be thought up during the wait, things that might never happen, but still thought of because you are waiting.

    I suppose if you called three times a day, that would be considered harassment. It is a shame they are not answering the phone. If they are that busy, they need to hire someone. They boil it down to money, but…they can always a couple million in their back pocket when they say they have none.

    Today. I hope you get the call early today, and you are off to the hospital. Is it possible to take him to Emergency to get it drained again while you’re waiting? My brother has made many trips to Emergency to have things drained (he has Crohns). One time, his stupid doctor did it in his office and poked the needle into his bowel. What a mess that was. Never again would he agree to have it done outside the hospital. And he no longer goes to that doctor.

    • dgkaye

      You’re so right Di, our imaginations can run wild, especially if you’re a writer.
      We may go back to hospital. The only thing about that is they can only draw 2-3 litres, and the radiologist can do 10. Plus they are trained. In the ER you aren’t getting a specialist. So we’re conflicted with this choice at the moment.
      Arg, so sorry about your brother. I have Crohn’s, so I know what a terrible disease that is.
      I’m crossing fingers for today! 🙂

  • First Night Design

    My heart goes out to you both. I have also been told that older people are not given priority when it comes to healthcare in the UK. It makes my blood boil. No one person is more important than an other. Any discrimination is abhorrent and prioritising when it comes to health is unspeakable. Take care.
    Sarah x

  • Ellie

    Oh D.G. how frustrating, especially for someone like you who gets things done in an organized way! Having to wait on others is exasperating! My heart goes out to you nd your husband and of course prayers are sent your way. With something like this I can’t even offer any nutritional advice which is also frustrating. Love and hugs to you both,

    • dgkaye

      Ellie, thanks again. I’m pretty well versed in the nutritional department, that’s why I enjoy your blog so much because you mix both health and God. It can be very difficult leaving mercy up to others. I am certainly learning a whole bunch of new lessons on this journey, especially patience.
      But my optimism won’t die, and where there is a will, I’ll find a way.

  • amreade

    Thank goodness your husband has you for an advocate! Can you imagine having to do this alone? While you’re feeling awful? Keeping you and your husband in my prayers.

    • dgkaye

      Thank you so much Amy. And no, the thought of even being sick myself with nobody to advocate for me would be truly frightening. Thanks for your well wishes. 🙂

  • Dorothy Sander

    I had no idea you were going through this! That’s what I get for not dropping in sooner. Your husband is fortunate to have an advocate! And I can attest to the poor quality of our medical system,despite the exorbitant cost. A doctor diagnosed my husband with asthma when he was having a heart attack. I haven’t trusted them since. So glad you’re working with a Naturopath. Practitioners who think outside of the box are so much better at caring for their patients. And seniors do get pushed to the back of the line in my experience as well. We just have to keep yelling about it all and do what we can to influence change. I’m afraid it all boils down to $. Will keep you and your hubby in my thoughts.

    • dgkaye

      Thanks so much for dropping by Dorothy. And never apologize. We are all so busy with our lives and our own strife sometimes. It seems you and I are on the same page when it comes to the health system. We do have to keep yelling, and the system is ruined because of the almighty dollar and cutbacks and bureaucrats.
      It’s been a long 2 months and keeping tabs on everything and everyone in the medical realm is exhausting. But I’ll never back down. I share my experience to help spread awareness. There’s nothing worse than being oblivious to medical issues and finding out surprises only when faced with a medical situation.
      Thanks again for your sharing here and your words of encouragement. I hope your hubby is okay now. 🙂

  • Hugh's Views and News

    I’m so sorry to hear about all the waiting, Debby. How frustrating it must be for you and hubby. I hope that long weekend passed quickly enough and that by the time you read this you’ve some answers, news and that things have moved on.
    Sending you both my best wishes and lots of hugs.

  • Sherri

    Oh Deb, I hope you’ve heard some news by now…what an agonising wait for you and hubby. I’ll keep an eye out on your latest posts via FB on my phone as I’m leaving tomorrow for the weekend to visit my boys so will not be on WP. I just want you to know I’m keeping you both in my prayers and sending you a ton of hugs and lots of love… <3 <3 <3

    • dgkaye

      Have a wonderful weekend Sherri with your boys. I hope everything is still getting better for you. Thanks so much for your love and prayers. I’ll FB you on the weekend! 🙂 xoxo <3

  • elainemansfield

    Fluid build-up in the lungs is very dangerous. I hope you have some help by now. Your journey brings back lots of hard memories. Is he having trouble breathing? I’m so sorry, Debby. Sending you big hugs and hope for help.

    • dgkaye

      I see you’ve already read the update, yes he was drained 2 days ago. I was beside myself with worry about the fluid nearing his lungs, that’s why I pushed so hard. Yes, his breathing was labored because his stomach was so big. There’s approximately 10 – 11 litres of fluid in him, but they can only take so much at one time to avoid disrupting blood pressure and electrolyte levels. They were hoping to take 6 litres, but only could get 4 out.
      Unfortunately now with his disease, this is what they’re monitoring. They don’t yet know if he’ll be a patient who will have to come once or twice a month for drainage, or if each draining will stay off without rebuilding. The first drainage last week in emergency, they only got 2 1/2 litres, – 6 pounds, and 5 of those pounds came back within 3 days. It’s now been 2 days since the last one, and thank God so far no weight gain. Right now we’re on a ‘watch and see’. The doctor said if he gains back the fluid before the next visit, to call and he’ll authorize another draining himself with the hospital, and if it turns out he’ll need them more frequent, he’ll authorize it so I can bypass waiting for the doctor, and call the hospital radiology myself to get him in right away. This is our new life, but it’s better than the alternative.
      The naturopath is also giving him IV therapy to help build up his levels to help his body to eliminate the fluids. I will see the prognosis in the coming week.
      Thanks for your concern and love. 🙂

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