Just Sayin'

#Social Media Etiquette, Rant, and a Surprise.

Published on by dgkaye

A social rant and a sign from heaven.

Today I wanted to talk about social media etiquette, and often – the lack of it. As I spend a few hours a day on social media, I’ve been noticing so many more spammy comments – particularly with the bombardment of messaging personal DM (direct messages). We already know Fakebook is notorious for this, but I’ve noticed DM spam ever-growing in my LinkedIn and Twitter accounts specifically.

On Twitter and LinkedIn, I’m getting a boatload of ‘buy my book, watch my video, subscribe to my website’ DMs. Quite frankly, I barely ever check those messages because they are a waste of my time.

On Fakebook, I’ve left the few grief groups I joined because the amount of messages I’ve been getting from sicko losers who prey on widows, hitting on us, is absolutely disgusting. Not to mention, I am once again banned from using Fakebook for a week, basically, because there really is no free speech there. Oh, um, let me correct that. There is free speech for evil if you are on the ‘right side’ of Fakebook. Apparently, you can freely post your convictions and hatred proudly if you are in with the QAnon, Proud Boys, and White Supremacy crowd. But when a post asks your opinion on a political issue that the Fakebook Big Brother monitors don’t agree with, you get banned. Honestly, I hate that site with a passion. Sadly, like most big corporations that get us in their strangle holds because there is nowhere else to connect with friends, we as writers, are stuck there.

On a brighter note, my girlfriend came to visit me on Saturday. When I walked her down to her car parked in the vacant spot beside my car that used to be my husband’s spot, she asked me if I noticed something on my car window.

The back window of my car.

There it was, clear as day, a heart drawn on my window. As I attempted to wipe it off, I discovered it was done from the inside of the window, it didn’t rub off. Nobody has been in my back seat for over a year. My beautiful husband has left me yet another sign he is with me. 💓💚💙

©DGKaye2022

90 thoughts on “#Social Media Etiquette, Rant, and a Surprise.”

  1. Debby, that’s amazing about the heart 💖 💖 💖 Don’t worry about horrible Facebook, it’s a total waste of time anyway. Apart from mind control, they decide what posts you can see from your friends, and stop you seeing most of them. We have no freedom there at all. Toni xx

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  3. I read Colleen’s comment about your Facebook account. I’ve long not used it other than for sharing reviews and wishing happy birthday to some of the people I don’t have any other way to contact, but I do feel like closing down all of my accounts very often, and I am sure I will do at some point. Not worth the bother. Love your husband’s message, Debby. Enjoy the visit and thanks for sharing your rants with us. We are all of the same mind.

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    1. Thanks for adding your thoughts Olga. I know quite a few of our writing friends have exited fb, I have a few author friends who fb won’t allow any shares of posts from their blogs, told their ‘book review’ posts go against their rules. LOL. What a crock! ❤

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  5. Hi Debby – what a great ‘message’ to find in the car … brilliant – clever hubby! I have to admit that I’m glad I never got too involved with things other than my blog … and as you say like you I ignore so much … it’s a pain – but as you’re doing: do what you can to mitigate things that irritate. Take care and enjoy the summer weather – cheers Hilary

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  9. A great surprise Debby. You are loved. I agree with your comments on Facebook. I also am getting tired of the vitriol and hate spread by the leftists on Twitter. I very seldom check “trending” anymore since there is usually a pack of hate messages there.

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  10. I’m so sorry you went through that whole ordeal with Facebook. Also, how wonderful it is to see a sign like that beautiful heart during your trying days 😀 Thank you for sharing this with us!

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  11. Facebook definitely sucks, at times. So sorry you’ve been banned temporarily! 😒 Yes, the incessant stream of would be Lotharios and spammers also gets tiresome, but blocking them works well. For me, Instagram is the worst for that! It must have felt wonderful to see that sign of love on your car window! 💖

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    1. Thanks Deb. That heart, forever etched. And yes! I have been hearing about so many problems and hacks on Insta. I still have a page there, but haven’t visited that site in a few years. ❤

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  12. Facebook drives me nuts but its the only way I keep in contact with some people. So I stay there, along with all my pictures, just in case. The heart is such a beautiful message of love that crosses all barriers. Xo

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    1. Thanks so much Denise. That heart certainly elevated my heart. And yes, I believe us writers that remain on fb are hanging in there to keep contact with others and mingle within our writing community and with readers, despite their BS rules and their HUGE invasion of our privacy. ❤

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  13. I love the message from your hubby- beautiful ❤
    I never comment, or post, anything that isn't uplifting on FB. There's enough negativity in this world, I don't want to see or read it there.

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  14. Love your heart message Debby definitely getting your attention… You are loved. .. And sadly to social media there are too many that use it to pray on the vulnerable…
    I never ever joined FB… Thank goodness…. I did however for a about two years join Linkedin and got the same bombardment … So I deleted my account.. Then Linkedin got its servers hacked and all our intel was lets say vulnerable… So now I get Spam to my email address saying I have a message on my Linked in account or I have had someone attempt to open my linkedin…. When I know I deleted it…. Hassle you can well do without..
    Not to mention Flirty Vera who is lonely lol…. It can be very frustrating especially when you dont share your private email with many … Im glad I do not share Phone information.

    Sending thoughts your way Debby.. Hope the Heart made up for the hassle ❤

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    1. Thanks for chiming in Sue. And yes, we are all so vulnerable in this digital world that is supposed to connect us, yet the evil find a way to ruin everything. And yes, thank goodness, I never add my phone to any site! Hugs ❤

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  15. I think that social media is fast becoming ‘unsocial media’ and the pendulum in my opinion is at the end of one swing and about to come back rapidly as people get fed up of all the vitriol. I only use the Diva’s these days on FB and the occasional birthday wishes on my own account… I use Twitter but never bother with the trending stuff and don’t follow anyone who has an agenda that is going to cause me stress. Too old and too cynical to believe most of the claptrap… However the main event you left until last.. How wonderful and ‘G’ is never far away…you are loved… ♥♥

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    1. Thanks for adding to the conversation Sal. I do the same on Twitter and only accept ‘follow’ invites from the writing community and some other creatives. I have enough garbage to contend with on Fakebook. And you are so right. My George is never far away from me. The confirmation took my breath away. ❤ xox

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  16. I’m so concerned about social media it’s the basis of the book I’m tweaking at the moment. Sorry to hear you’re in FB jail again when, as you say, some horrific things are allowed. Love the heart. ❤

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  17. I’ve stuck with FB because I want to stay connected with friends and family all over the world. The other day I shared the sad news on my FB that my daughter’s dog died tragically a day after a coyote attack in her suburban backyard, with her gofundme link for vet expenses. She is not on Facebook either but so many people replied and donated. The outpouring of love and acknowledgement was overwhelming and appreciated and to me, these are the kind of posts we need to see. I get the reasons people leave SM. I’m not on instagram now for other reasons and only use Twitter for blog stuff. I only check FB a few minutes a day and really keep away from SM as a rule. As for your sign from Heaven, yes, now that is real, my friend and God, not FB, works in mysterious and meaningful ways.

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    1. Thanks so much Terri for sharing your take. I’m sorry to hear about your daughter’s dog, but happy to learn about the kindness of others. Sounds like you and I are stuck on FB for same reasons – for now. As for Insta, I abandoned my page years ago and am hearing about lots of hacking and spamming going on there lately. And true dat, God does work in beautiful and mysterious ways. Hugs xx

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  19. Facebook is a balancing act for sure. I’m not ready to give it up because it’s an easy way to keep up with many of my friends and former students, but then there’s all that negative crap too.

    The sad thing about predators is they often find someone who needs their ugly attention.

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    1. Thanks Pete. Sounds like we are all only there for same reasons. I do read news articles there too, and that’s when I feel compelled to say my piece, which apparently isn’t appreciated by the average person. And yes, those lurkers and scammers, sadly, do always find a sucker. 🙂

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  20. How sweet! I think I’d find a way to frame the heart (though I have not the slightest idea how)!
    I am almost never on FB, and I’ve been in FB “jail” for liking too many comments–go figure!

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      1. Your welcome.
        There seems to be no rhyme or reason-I would think it was politically motivated but the likes ran the gamut of a lot of spectrums politically and personally-go figure!!
        🙂

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  21. Love the sign from your husband, dear Debby. So precious. And, of course, we can all relate to the growing amount of spam on social media. It’s one of the reasons I’m not using Instagram anymore. I thought I’d stop temporarily over six months ago, but I have yet to post a photo since then. As with everything, we need to find a healthy balance.

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    1. Thanks Liesbet. And it seems everyone here has mentioned their avoidance to Instagram, just as I have for a good few years now. And no surprise Fakebook owns Insta, which I here way worse stories going on there. ❤

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  22. I’ve still resisted Facebook/Fakebook–happily so. I get the occasional hilarious cartoon (usually political) shared with me by the wife. As for Twitter–I couldn’t dare; too likely to get in troll trouble for schadenfreude tweets about you know who and his enablers/allies.
    Wonderful find of the heart though!

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    1. Thanks John. I know what you refer to. I am strictly all about books and writing on Twitter. The writing community is great there. But fakebook, that’s a whole ‘nother game. And when I see red, I’m going to call it out – hence my being in jail at least 4/5 times a year. LOL 🙂

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  23. Oh, that heart on the window of your car is so sweet! Makes me believe in the power of love!
    As for FB, I have only been on it for just a few months and rarely post but do read some posts of people I like. I found it very sad that people would go on grieving groups to take advantage of those who have lost a loved one. So very cruel.
    The only other social media I’m on is WordPress and hope to get back on it more regularly.

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  24. FB sucks, DMs constipate, trolls need to go to hell in a hand basket. Glad we can still express opinions on WP. As to George . . . what a sweetheart! How you must have melted when you saw his message. I’ll end this on the flip side of where I started: George rocks! ❤️💛💚💙💜

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  26. I saw Collen’s commnet. Like everything else FB is a necessary evil if you write, and a sewer of exactly what you talk about. But you were in good company they once banned all my WP dude posts, removed them, along with all my other blog posts links from before and everything cos they were deemed offensive. As I said to Colleen I sent them a blog link every day for a few weeks asking them to please outline as to how re their policy this was offensive so I would when writing this simple first ever post for example what I had done wrong so as not to do it again… Let’s just say they got tired before I did. xxxx

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    1. SistahG! Thank you. I did see your comment when Colleen posted for me, but of course, I cannot ‘like’ or comment til Sunday LOL. Gawd, I have heard all kinds of writers that have their blog posts completely banned there for years! What the hell is up with that. Good on you for fighting back, but as I have experienced, they ask me to fill out a refute, only to be told that I’m not allowed to comment. Nazi much? I think once we’re a target, those bots don’t let go. As for the dudes, well, ya know, they can be bad LOLOL. Thanks for chiming in Shey xoxo

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  28. HI Debby, I don’t have this problem with either Linked in or Twitter. Occasionally I get a strange comment on FB by some man asking me to friend him. I just delete those comments. I generally don’t have much of a problem with spam and I hope it stays like that.

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      1. Indeed. They also practice the transnational repression, but democratic governments can only amend the laws, and it takes time for citizens to wait. Not to mention some people may collude with them. 😟

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  31. That heart!!! I had goosebumps, Sis. That is totally amazing! FB… well, you know if I could delete that account forever I would. I like Twitter the best, but if Musk takes over he will let the evil one back on the platform… that is when I’ll leave. I’m already seeing some changes I don’t care for on Twitter. But, then we must stay connected somehow. ❤

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  32. Had to laugh when you called it Fakebook. That’s so funny. So sorry to hear you’ve been getting spammy messages. It sounds so annoying. I’ve never been a huge fan of Facebook. It’s a platform for some and some like it. That’s alright but for me, it comes across as focuses on presenting highlights of life…and to me there’s always more beneath the surface. What a lovely story about the heart. Your husband is always there watching out for you ❤️

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    1. Thank you Mabel. And you are better off not on fakebook. But mostly those who are only there to keep connected and put up with the privacy invasion. ❤

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      1. I must say I do have the messenger app on my phone to keep connected with friends across the world. Aside from that, don’t have motivation to go on Fakebook. Staying off has been so refreshing, keeping it that way. Hugs to you, Debby 🤗❤

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  34. I agree with you. The privacy settings on FB are a joke. Mine were set to ‘Friends only’. But they were sending pure strangers friend requests on my behalf – why?! I had over 180 friends listed and all female apart from my husband. I woke up one morning to discover that a man in Lebanon had ‘accepted’ a fake friend request and while I was sleeping (time zone difference) he had access to all my photos & other personal info! It wasnt his fault – he just accepted tge request. This happened again 3 months later, even though I reported it. So, nobodys account is safe.

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    1. Wow, thanks for sharing your awful experience. There are so many getting through the supposed protections. I know many being hacked and having their accounts stolen. Fakebook is a free for all with really no babysitters, except guard dogs who don’t want to hear comments of opinion that don’t fit in with their authoritarian standards.

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