I’ve Been Quoted! -The Impact of Narcissistic Parents | MakeItUltra™

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How many times as writers do we read famous quotes by writers and empowering people from various fields? Many I should think. But do we as writers ever think about our own words being quoted by others? I know I never thought about that because usually famous quotes are from famous people.


Well I can tell you I’m far from famous, but last week it was brought to my attention by one of my lovely friends, Jane Sturgeon that she had read an article on children raised by a narcissistic parent and the first line in the article was a quote from my book – Conflicted Hearts. I was both shocked and over the moon with pride when I went over to psychotherapist – Dr. Perry’s blog and saw it with my own eyes. In fact, much of what he covered in the article I lived through with my narcissistic mother and described in my book. It makes me wonder if he read my book?


The Impact of Narcissistic Parents

By Dr. Perry, PhD

“Somehow I believed it was my obligation to try and do the right thing by her because she had given birth to me.” ~D.G. Kaye

It is an understatement to state that parenting is difficult. It is perhaps the only job a person can get that is full-time and for life without having all the requisite skills and qualifications. The responsibility is great. One must equip a child with all the necessary tools they will need in adulthood to forge their own lives. It is a self-less relationship that most parents take great pride in. From the moment their child is born, the child becomes the focal point of the family unit. While this is a non-issue to most couples, what happens when one of the parents lacks empathy and is unable to see the importance in anyone else’s feelings or interests?

Perhaps you were raised by a self-proclaimed or widely admired super parent. Admired by all of the community, to the outside world, your parent had it all. On paper, everyone saw a doting parent, a successful career, marriage and with positive community involvement in church or school activities. But, reflecting on our childhood we realize that behind closed doors the reality was a lot harsher and lonelier than the public image portrayed. As we get older and start to form a life of our own we begin to see our parents more as real humans and not the superheroes of our childhood. This is quite normal and healthy. Stripped of the cape of perfection that kept us in an unequal relationship, we can then begin to form a healthy adult relationship with our parents.

But what happens if once the heroic cape is removed, we notice that our parental figure has nothing to offer us. They are basically an egocentric person who is essentially empty, fearful and manipulative. We take notice that they purposely use control and manipulation to keep us engaged in an unhealthy relationship. Our parents should want us to leave the nest and soar and not to live in their shadows. But, the NPD parent does not want his child to live an independent life. They see their children as an extension of themselves to use as they wish.

Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is a spectrum disorder which means it exists on a continuum. . . continue reading.


Source: The Impact of Narcissistic Parents | MakeItUltra™

Promote Your Book Reviews – #ShareAReviewDay #MondayBlogs | The Write Stuff

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The talented and often hilarious Marcia Meara of The Write Stuff has generously started a new weekly series on her blog – Share a Review Day. Marcia kindly invites authors to submit some of their book’s reviews to her and she will feature them on her blog. Wow, another generous author who will help promote our books! Don’t miss this opportunity!


NOTE: #ShareAReviewDay #MondayBlogs

Last week, I decided to add a new feature on The Write Stuff: Share A Review Day. (See my post HERE). I had originally planned to do this on Wednesday, but after my Senior Moment passed, I realized I’m already committed to a pretty detailed #NotesFromTheRiver post on Wednesdays. 😯 Therefore, I’m going to run our Share A Review Day on Tuesdays, commencing tomorrow. Please continue reading over at Marcia’s blog.


Source: NOTE: #ShareAReviewDay #MondayBlogs | The Write Stuff

Sunday Book Review – The Cruel Romance: A Novel of Love and War by Marina Osipova

Book reviews by D.G. Kaye

I recently finished this book, The Cruel Romance: A Novel of Love and War by Marina Osipova. I learned about and connected with Marina on Sally Cronin’s author interviews and new books series at Sally’s virtual Bookstore and Cafe. I knew I wanted to read this book so didn’t hesitate to purchase it and bump it up on my big fat TBR. It’s historical fiction from the WWII era and that is one of my favorite genres to read when I’m not reading nonfiction. Have a look at my review below:





On October 1941, in a small village outside Moscow, Serafima bids farewell to Vitya, a Soviet officer going to the front. With only moments left together, she places a cross around her beloveds neck and reluctantly releases him into a cruel world where nothing is certain, especially whether she will ever see him again.

Days later, Germans invade her village and take over her tiny house. Serafima and her mother must comply with orders, endure abuse, and stay put, or their village will be annihilated.

As World War II intertwines Serafimas and Vityas life with that of a young German violinist and a Russian intellectual, their destinies are irrevocably altered. Can they rise to the challenge of agonizing moral choices and learn to forgive and love again?


The Cruel Romance is a tale of love, violence, and acceptance as Serafima is forced to live with what the Germans left behind. This compelling story makes for a thrilling read in a setting and time that comes to life, pulling the reader into the vividly drawn, rarely seen world (Elisabeth Amaral, author of When Any Kind of Love Will Do and Czar Nicholas, The Toad, and Duck Soup).


My 5 Star Review:

A cruel romance indeed. And as we all know, nothing is fair in love or war.

A fast paced, unputdownable engaging read from Osipova where she takes us into the troubled, and life of hardship of Serafima, a poor Russian girl, barely yet 18 years old. Serafima is caught in the midst of WWII and a sorrowful parting with her newly flourishing love with Victor who is heading off to the Russian front to join the war. Serafima vows to wait for him, both in virtue and in her heart. The author paints vivid imagery with poignant settings and well fleshed out complicated characters in a complicated time.

Already living in a tiny village in the forest, well outside of Moscow, Serafima knows poverty and hunger well, yet never complains. Living with her emotionless mother in a tiny hut, she learns that her hardships are about to get a lot worse after  two German soldiers invade and take over her tiny home, complete with her and her mother as their private slaves, where Serafima endures the brunt of mental and physical abuse.

Throughout the passing years, Serafima never stops pining for her lost love Victor. And as the war comes to an end and the Germans move out, Serafima finds herself with child. We are now drawn into the raw emotion  and struggle Serafima must deal with when her child is born and her disgust for his conception overshadows any joy she should have from giving birth and ultimately, distancing herself emotionally from her own child.

When a few more years pass, still with hope her Victor will return to marry her, she receives a rude awakening one day when he does return and he spots her child. A misunderstanding from unspoken words and a lifetime of holding back the truth changes the course of Serafima’s life dramatically. Instead Serafima continues to work and make the best life she can  while dismissing her undying love for Victor and learning to live with a broken heart.

Victor too never stopped loving Serafima despite their lack of reconciliation, and demonstrates how unresolved love can grow into vengeance. Life is a circle, and secrets of the past have a way of working themselves back into one’s life just as they did for Serafima, when she was faced to make peace with her past. Can she ever find love again? Will she eventually reunite with Victor? You will have to read the book to find out.

This book had me turning pages at every opportunity I could pick up the book. I will say. the ending was quite surprising, The book was beautifully written and so engaging I can’t help but give it 5 stars!


Interview with Debby Gies from “D.G. Kaye” – Esme Salon

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I was recently invited over to Esme’s blog over at Esmesalon to answer 20 plus 1 questions about myself.


All about your BLOG:
Tell us about you lovely BLOG.


What is the name of your blog and how did you decide on your blog name?

1. My blog is https://atomic-temporary-200280624.wpcomstaging.com . As a published author I felt it best to make the blog’s name with my author name to avoid any confusion with a fictional or whimsical name.


What prompted you to start on this blogging journey?

2. While I was writing my first book, Conflicted Hearts I spent the year learning about the self-publishing business. I learned how important it was to think ahead for marketing books, so I needed to build a platform – let people know I existed, make connections with people and share what I learn in the writing community, articles about my work and share information about fellow bloggers and authors


To date, what blogging achievement/s are you most proud of?

3. I am most proud of the wonderful friends and connections I’ve made through blogging, the amount of readers that follow me, engage with me, share my posts, the awards I’ve received and the invitations I’ve received to guest post on other’s blogs, such as yours Esmé.


How would you describe your own blogging style?

4. Eclectic. I am a writer, author, justice seeker, and gifted with a good sense of humor. I like to post 3 times a week, but often there will be a few surprise posts that creep in. On Tuesdays I like to post something personal about something I learned, felt unjustifiable, or about memoir writing. On Fridays I’d like to get back to doing guest author interviews, but in the absence of doing those interviews I keep Friday posts geared towards writing tips or authorly news. And, every last Friday of the month I contribute to the #WATWB (We are the World Blogfest) where all participants post a blogshare of something uplifting and inspirational to share positive things about what goes on in the world to deflect negativity. Every Sunday I share a new book review from a book I’ve read and posted on Amazon and Goodreads.


What excites you most about blogging?

5. The friendships I’ve made and the engagement between myself and my readers. We have a wonderful community where bloggers often become friends. Writing can be a solitary and lonely life, so the blogging part provides the social interaction we get with like-minded people.


What platform do you use and why?

6. I am self-hosted on WordPress.Org. When I began blogging in early 2013 I started on free WordPress.com and within the year I learned about marketing and self-publishing . . . Continue reading

Source: Interview with Debby Gies from “D.G. Kaye” – Esme Salon


I’d also like to mention here and thank Kathleen Aherne who runs the Blogger’s Pit Stop with her crew, for choosing my linkuppost, https://dgkayewriter.wordpress.com/insecurities-joining-social-activities/ as a featured winning post of the week. You can check out the post feature HERE


Blogger's Pit Stop feature winner


#WATWB – We Are The World Blogfest – Random Acts of Kindness

We are the World Blogfest


Today I’m sharing my last Friday of the month contribution for the #WATWB – We are The World Blogfest community I am part of. Once a month we share something inspiring and uplifting to acknowledge positive things in the world instead of focusing on the negative things.


I came across this uplifting video where a girl decided to do 20 Random Acts of Kindness for her twentieth birthday. Often people look forward to receiving gifts on their birthdays, especially at younger ages, but this girl decided she wanted to share her birthday by giving back to some of the people who make a difference in her life and to some random strangers who she could make smile by leaving surprise gifts and notes to find.


Watch this inspirational video!


This month’s #WATWB is hosted by    Shilpa Garg, Inderpreet Kaur UppalPeter NenaAndrea Michaels, DamyantiBiswas. Please link to them in your WATWB posts and go say hi! 


 Please feel free to join us by posting something inspirational and uplifting by adding your link to your post to the LINKUP HERE.

The Quiet Ones… – The Silent Eye by Sue Vincent – The Daily Echo

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How do you define compassion? What does a knight in shining armor look like? Quite possibly there’s one in your life? This is a beautiful post written by Sue Vincent



The computer decided to play the fool, doing unmentionable things with no provocation. I’d only just sorted the email that had blocked me from answering anything, even though it let me see all the emails piling up. And, to make matters worse, I have one of these horrid winter bugs that turn your brain to mush. By the end of the day, I had tried everything I could think of… it was time to ask for help.

That can be a difficult thing to do sometimes… not for a technical problem like mine, when we are all too ready to scream for any help we can get, but for the real things that affect how we can live our lives. My son and I have been talking about this a lot since his return from India, where the kindness and compassion of the people he met there allowed him to experience many things he would otherwise not have been able to access, and indeed, had it not been for a complete stranger, a ‘knight in shining armour’, his trip could have been a disaster from the start.

What does a knight in shining armour look like? They are everywhere, hidden in plain sight, quietly ready to take up the quest and tilt at windmills on our behalf. People are often ready to go to extraordinary lengths to help each other, as long as we ourselves are able to admit a need and accept the help that is offered. Compassion may see the need before we are ready to admit that it is there. It never makes a noise about itself, but simply gets to work to do what it can.

How do you define compassion? Continue reading . . .



Source: The quiet ones… – The Silent Eye

Smorgasbord Posts from Your Archives – The Joys of #Travel Not! by D.G. Kaye | Smorgasbord – Variety is the spice of life

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I recently contributed a series of 4 posts to Sally Cronin’s Smorgasbord Invitation for her new ‘Share your travel stories from your archives series.” Today I’m going to share the first of the 4 I contributed. It’s always fun looking back at things we wrote about in our archives.


Smorgasbord Posts from Your Archives – The Joys of #Travel Not! by D.G. Kaye

Welcome to Posts from your Archive with a travel theme… if you have stories to share that you have posted on your blog in the past you will find the details at the end of the post.

Author D.G. Kaye (Debby Gies) is a seasoned traveler and has accumulated a wealth of knowledge and experience over the years.  In this post she shares some of the joys of travel that we face when we put ourselves in the hands of airlines.

The Joys of #Travel Not! by D.G. Kaye


Traveling is hard enough these days, but add in a mix of extra city traffic, due to lane closures, construction and Toronto hosting the PanAm games, and driving in this city is a horror.

As many of you know, I’ve just returned from a week off to Las Vegas. This post is one of two (maybe three) I’ve written on my little getaway.

Within the week before I went on vacation to Las Vegas, two of our Canadian airlines had six bomb threats. And two days before I left, there was a Wildcat Strike by the fuelers of the airplanes. It was also July fourth weekend, and the U.S. was on an extra precautionary high alert.

Amidst all that commotion, you have me and my husband hoping our plane would take off SAFELY. There were two days of backlogged planes that were cancelled and delayed prior to the 5th, when we were to leave. I spent the previous day keeping an ear to the news updates, in hopes of hearing about the sudden unauthorized strike being resolved.

I went and did my 24 hour prior to flight check-in, and was happy to find that my flight, so far, hadn’t yet been cancelled. While I was surfing the Air Canada site, I thought I might as well double-check the baggage restrictions. My instincts told me that because there had been so much chatter and complaints about people getting ridiculous with the size and amount of their carry-ons, trying to avoid baggage fees, that the airlines may start clamping down at any time. No doubt, it’s those people with over-loaded carry-ons that ruin it for others. The overhead storage compartments on the plane get over-stuffed and the last stragglers on the plane often have no place to put their carry-ons.

So, naturally, as I surmised, the airlines had changed their dimensions of allowable carry-ons. Was it a coincidence these new guidelines changed within a month of my travel date? I found out that if regulations aren’t followed, our carry-ons would be checked and charged the same fee as though it were a regular bag. I also noted the standard carry-on legal size guide was somehow shortened to no longer than 21 1/2 inches long (from the previous 23″), INCLUDING WHEELS AND HANDLES. Continue reading . . .


Source: Smorgasbord Posts from Your Archives – The Joys of #Travel Not! by D.G. Kaye | Smorgasbord – Variety is the spice of life

Sunday Book Review – The Fall of Lilith by Vashti Quiroz Vega # Fantasy

Book reviews by D.G. Kaye


Today’s Sunday Book Review is about Vashti Quiroz Vega’s book – The Fall of Lilith. As you can tell from many of my book reviews, which do span over various genres, despite my addiction to nonfiction and political thrillers, I’m not one who reads a lot of epic fantasies, but was so drawn to this book for the subject matter – angels. Also, this book is like two books in one, making it quite a lengthy read, something else I don’t normally gravitate to – long books. But I was totally engrossed in this book and am now completely hooked and eagerly awaiting Book 2.




In The Fall of Lilith, Vashti Quiroz-Vega crafts an irresistible new take on heaven and hell that boldly lays bare the passionate, conflicted natures of God’s first creations: the resplendent celestial beings known as angels.

If you think you know their story, think again.

Endowed with every gift of mind, body, and spirit, the angels reside in a paradise bounded by divine laws, chief of which are obedience to God, and celibacy. In all other things, the angels possess free will, that they may add in their own unique ways to God’s unfolding plan.

Lilith, most exquisite of angels, finds the rules arbitrary and stifling. She yearns to follow no plan but her own: a plan that leads to the throne now occupied by God himself. With clever words and forbidden caresses, Lilith sows discontent among the angels. Soon the virus of rebellion has spread to the greatest of them all: Lucifer.

Now, as angel is pitted against angel, old loyalties are betrayed and friendships broken. Lust, envy, pride, and ambition arise to shake the foundations of heaven . . . and beyond. For what begins as a war in paradise invades God’s newest creation, a planet known as Earth. It is there, in the garden called Eden, that Lilith, Lucifer, and the other rebel angels will seek a final desperate victory—or a venomous revenge.

“[A] compelling narrative that . . . strays far from traditional biblical text . . . A well-written, descriptive, and dark creation story.”—Kirkus Reviews


My 5 Star Review:

The tale of Lilith takes us into the world above where angels reside in God’s kingdom, then ultimately leading to the descent of many of them later on to earth as Lilith’s plotting and dire need to gain power and overthrow God’s ultimate power takes us on an incredible journey of desire, deceit and seduction as Lilith ensnares some of her fellow angels to join her on her rebellion to overtake God’s power.

The characters are exquisitely fleshed out, many of the angels and their hierarchy we are familiar with are spun into a tale of a separation of the angels – the good and the evil, chosen by their own free will. Some of these angels remain as we know them exactly for what they stand for, while in this story, even angels can behave badly by the powers of persuasion.

Lilith is a force to be reckoned with, and reckoning will fall upon her as she continues her journey after being evicted from heaven (Floraison), stubbornly refusing to give up her mission to overtake God’s creations.

The story is loosely based on the Old Testament bible and well crafted into the author’s own tale of good versus evil with vivid imagery and characters (angels) we feel compassion for as well as others we’ll find ourselves rooting for them to get their just desserts. I can’t wait for Book 2!