The light – something I strive daily to stand under.
I need the light to stay in the light. Does that make sense? When I think of the woes of the world I have to stop myself and take my thoughts right back to where there is light – far away from the darkness. When my grief (at the loss of my beloved) bubbles up as it does daily, I say the words, “I love you honey” out loud. For me that’s a method I’ve been working that helps me get through the trigger moments. When that old grief monster creeps into my head and to scenes of my husband’s dying I shout out my love for him and stop myself from going ‘there’ – to that dark place, and strive to put my brain in happier thoughts. But let me tell you, this dancing around grief ain’t for sissies!
SAD syndrome is real. It certainly doesn’t help with my dark moments. I am someone who is most definitely affected by the lack of light. I’ve recently purchased a Lightbox. Does it help? I’m not feeling the love. No, I want sunshine. I don’t care if it’s snowing with sunny skies or on a tropical island, just give me the light. For me, I feel happy, energetic and just plain motivated when the sun is shining. And the fact that I haven’t even sat in the sun since last winter’s Mexican getaway just exacerbates my need. Last summer, we didn’t have one. Oh yes, we did have a season that has been typically known to be summer, but this past one all we got was sickening humidity with grey covered smokey skies. Ironically, the sun would fight the smoke and stick out its face well after 4pm when the motivation to go out to the sundeck had long passed.
There’s a lot to be said about sunshine and its uplifting benefits as well as giving us well needed Vitamin D, which in this country is sorely lacking for many months a year here, having to supplement with the vitamin. So after one longgggggggg year of being pastey white and praying to the sun gods, I’m thrilled to announce that my winter break with sunshine is finally nearing. If you would have asked me in early December if I’m going away, I would have told you I still wasn’t booked for anything because I couldn’t get a suitably priced condo to rent, and the prices of airfare have gone out of control. So I threw up my arms after putting my wishes out to the universe, and magically, opportunities came to me.
The agent I previously rented from texted me with an offer to rent a brand new condo he just sold to someone, too late in the season to put up for rent, so he called me with a great price offer to rent the condo. In the same week, my good friend Brenda from Manitoba who rents in the condo complex I used to stay at, invited me to come stay with her for two weeks. I told her I wasn’t flying all that expensive way for just two weeks and that I would try and put together an add-on before I got to her place, and the condo my agent offered me fell right in line with the time-frame. And just after I accepted to book the condo for two weeks, my good friend here, Mahvash called me and told me she would join me for the two weeks. So lucky me! I’ll soon be off with Mahvash for what I think will be a very fun and interesting time together, especially since she’s never been anywhere tropical, and then off to Brenda’s to my old stomping grounds right on the beach, for what I know will be filled with laughter – and margaritas – but maybe a gin and tonic for Bren.
So, I am happy to announce that I most certainly am going back to Puerto Vallarta this year for some well-needed sunshine and girlfriend time. I am determined to turn this pastey skin into something more sun-kissed. My camera is ready at the helm with all its new features and I look forward to taking some fun and spectacular photos to share with you upon my return. Until then, I’m signing off here on the blog and will resume blogging later next month. As always, I will still be checking comments here and although I won’t be reading blogs during my break on any kind of regular schedule, don’t be surprised if I show up here and there in some quieter moments.
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Take me away Calgon!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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